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Does It Hurt More Or Less? - Romance - Nairaland

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Does It Hurt More Or Less? by justwise(m): 10:48am On Sep 23, 2009
For guys, will it hurt u more if u caught ur gf cheating on u with another girl than a man? Same question to the ladies, will it hurt u more or less if he cheats with another man?
Re: Does It Hurt More Or Less? by posakosa(m): 12:08pm On Sep 23, 2009
It hurts either way. It depends on how much you really like the person.
Re: Does It Hurt More Or Less? by posakosa(m): 12:10pm On Sep 23, 2009
If the person has informed me from the beginning that they are NOT monogamous in anyway and its been my choice to continue the relationship, then it may not hurt as much because I, myself, will be playing my own game. As they've been upfront with me from the getgo,

I imagine that it HURTS more when theres an expectation that this individual is monogamous and then, aarrgh, they're with another person.
Re: Does It Hurt More Or Less? by AniLee(f): 12:14pm On Sep 23, 2009
I think my first reaction will be a major turn off. Then definitely followed up by disgust. And then may be awe i.e. after getting over the fact that its a man. But generally I dont think I will get hurt because it would be a strange and shocking position to be in. But u never know, posa dearest might have a point there too.
Re: Does It Hurt More Or Less? by justwise(m): 12:34pm On Sep 23, 2009
Ani Lee:

I think my first reaction will be a major turn off. Then definitely followed up by disgust. And then may be awe i.e. after getting over the fact that its a man. [b]But generally I dont think I will get hurt because it would be a strange and shocking position to be in. But u never know, posa dearest might have a point there too. [/b]

Exactly! cos u be wondering wht is going on then again u will think well, he is getting what a woman can not give him but u can't figure out what exactly its
Re: Does It Hurt More Or Less? by justwise(m): 12:35pm On Sep 23, 2009
posakosa:

If the person has informed me from the beginning that they are NOT monogamous in anyway and its been my choice to continue the relationship, then it may not hurt as much because I, myself, will be playing my own game. As they've been upfront with me from the getgo,

I imagine that it HURTS more when theres an expectation that this individual is monogamous and then, aarrgh, they're with another person.

If he tells u from day1 wouldn't that be a turn off?
Re: Does It Hurt More Or Less? by MissyB1(m): 12:38pm On Sep 23, 2009
Catch my man 'hitting' anatha man's butt? shocked shocked
It's not the cheating that would hurt me . . . .It's knowing that I once allowed him
into my life.
Re: Does It Hurt More Or Less? by justwise(m): 12:40pm On Sep 23, 2009
Missy B:

Catch my man 'hitting' anatha man's butt? shocked shocked
It's not the cheating that would hurt me . . . .It's knowing that I once allowed him
into my life.
.

Would u feel that same way if u caught him cheating on u with a woman?
Re: Does It Hurt More Or Less? by MissyB1(m): 12:46pm On Sep 23, 2009
That would seem more normal and hurt less.
Re: Does It Hurt More Or Less? by iice(f): 12:46pm On Sep 23, 2009
posakosa:

If the person has informed me from the beginning that they are NOT monogamous in anyway and its been my choice to continue the relationship, then it may not hurt as much because I, myself, will be playing my own game. As they've been upfront with me from the getgo,

I imagine that it HURTS more when theres an expectation that this individual is monogamous and then, aarrgh, they're with another person.

posakosa:

It hurts either way. It depends on how much you really like the person.

More or less, same thing i was thinking
Re: Does It Hurt More Or Less? by justwise(m): 12:49pm On Sep 23, 2009
Missy B:

That would seem more normal and hurt less.

Hmmm, to be honest, its a tough one. I'm not sure what i will do if i caught my gf screwing another gal
Re: Does It Hurt More Or Less? by justwise(m): 12:58pm On Sep 23, 2009
iice:

More or less, same thing i was thinking

If u are madly inlove with him will u let him off and keep him?
Re: Does It Hurt More Or Less? by iice(f): 12:59pm On Sep 23, 2009
No cheating. . .
Re: Does It Hurt More Or Less? by justwise(m): 1:07pm On Sep 23, 2009
iice:

No cheating. . .

U know sometimes when one is cheated on with an opposite sex, u will be thinking why did he/she do that? Was it cos i'm not doing enough in bedroom department or the other woman/man is good at something.

But when the cheating is with the same sex, its hard to figure out what exactly that drives him/her to that.
Re: Does It Hurt More Or Less? by posakosa(m): 1:09pm On Sep 23, 2009
I must have been in a haste to respond or maybe the OP edited the original post, I didn't know that this was about same-sex/homosexual relationships,


But urm, undecided undecided undecided undecided
Re: Does It Hurt More Or Less? by posakosa(m): 1:11pm On Sep 23, 2009
justwise:

If he tells u from day1 wouldn't that be a turn off?

If he says from day 1 thats he's a gay, HELL NAW! lipsrsealed lipsrsealed lipsrsealed lipsrsealed lipsrsealed
Re: Does It Hurt More Or Less? by iice(f): 1:14pm On Sep 23, 2009
justwise:

U know sometimes when one is cheated on with an opposite sex, u will be thinking why did he/she do that? Was it cos i'm not doing enough in bedroom department or the other woman/man is good at something.

But when the cheating is with the same sex, its hard to figure out what exactly that drives him/her to that.

I don't find it hard to figure that out.  If he cheats with the same sex.  .  .it would mean that he was either bisexual or he hadn't known/settled for sure that he was gay.  Besides some gay men have wives and kids *shrugs*

If it's with the opposite sex, again *shrugs*.
I doubt i would be thinking that.  .  .I tend not to react as what people call 'normal' undecided
Re: Does It Hurt More Or Less? by justwise(m): 1:19pm On Sep 23, 2009
posakosa:

I must have been in a haste to respond or [b]maybe the OP edited the original post, I didn't know that this was about same-sex/homosexual relationships, [/b]


But urm, undecided undecided undecided undecided

No i did not edit it, i see u are struggling to get ur head around the whole issue.ahaha
Re: Does It Hurt More Or Less? by justwise(m): 1:23pm On Sep 23, 2009
iice:

I don't find it hard to figure that out. If he cheats with the same sex. . .it would mean that he was either bisexual or he hadn't known/settled for sure that he was gay. Besides some gay men have wives and kids *shrugs*

If it's with the opposite sex, again *shrugs*.
I doubt i would be thinking that. . .I tend not to react as what people call 'normal' undecided


Absolutely! that was y i started this topic. A friend, married with 3kids caught her hubby with another man, but she is confused.
He still confess his love for her, very good dady and husband, he works hard and look after the family. She is really confused about the whole thing
Re: Does It Hurt More Or Less? by iice(f): 1:27pm On Sep 23, 2009
justwise:

Absolutely! that was y i started this topic. A friend, married with 3kids caught her hubby with another man, but she is confused.
He still confess his love for her, very good dady and husband, he works hard and look after the family. She is really confused about the whole thing

Ahhhh
Well he loves her as the mother of his kids, wife and companion but he's not necessarily jonesing to jump her bones. It happens. Some couples work that out. . .like having an open relationship, some divorce. . .others struggle to keep the family together and not cheat. . .
Re: Does It Hurt More Or Less? by Ben13: 1:29pm On Sep 23, 2009
lol funny. . .another lady shocked It hurts more
Re: Does It Hurt More Or Less? by justwise(m): 1:32pm On Sep 23, 2009
iice:

Ahhhh
Well he loves her as the mother of his kids, wife and companion but he's not necessarily jonesing to jump her bones. It happens. Some couples work that out. . .like having an open relationship, some divorce. . .others struggle to keep the family together and not cheat. . .


Up untill last wk when she caught him, she never ever susppected nothing, they dated for abt 3yrs b4 marriage, now this
Re: Does It Hurt More Or Less? by iice(f): 1:44pm On Sep 23, 2009
justwise:

Up untill last wk when she caught him, she never ever susppected nothing, they dated for abt 3yrs b4 marriage, now this

Sometimes, they keep it in, in the hopes that the feeling goes away. Others try to prove themselves wrong, sometimes they are just afraid. . .I always tell people to get their gaydar up and running. If yours is strong, you can sense it. . .
Re: Does It Hurt More Or Less? by justwise(m): 2:00pm On Sep 23, 2009
iice:

Sometimes, they keep it in, in the hopes that the feeling goes away. Others try to prove themselves wrong, sometimes they are just afraid. . .I always tell people to get their gaydar up and running. If yours is strong, you can sense it. . .

She wants to run but then again its not easy
Re: Does It Hurt More Or Less? by iice(f): 2:02pm On Sep 23, 2009
True, not only because it's a marriage but they have kids together.
Hopefully she finds strength to pick a path she can walk on with no regrets.
Re: Does It Hurt More Or Less? by justwise(m): 2:09pm On Sep 23, 2009
Pple are telling her to hang around and seek help together, even her family and his family too.

They are very happy family, nobody wants to believe her cos the hubby is very likable man.

I'm shocked as well
Re: Does It Hurt More Or Less? by Donvilo(m): 2:42pm On Sep 23, 2009
Well as for me, If it were of the opposite sex, I would try and get over it but for the same sex! shocked lipsrsealed I will feel very sick and get more confused. But will later try and find out what pushed her into that kind of act due to my love for her. sad
Re: Does It Hurt More Or Less? by eyonigger(m): 3:19pm On Sep 23, 2009
Dude is just having a sexual adventure, he truly loves his wife. Homo is a very tricky shyt, u keep wondering why men/boys you never expect get caught up in such act.

As for me, if I catch my gurl with another lady, I would feel bad, but would feel more hurt catching her with another guy.
Re: Does It Hurt More Or Less? by posakosa(m): 3:22pm On Sep 23, 2009
If you catch your girl in bed with another girl, YOU JOIN them, cool cool cool cool cool
Re: Does It Hurt More Or Less? by Enoyoh: 3:59pm On Sep 23, 2009
its digusting; I mean in our society its a terrible thing to do
Re: Does It Hurt More Or Less? by TheSeeker(m): 5:19pm On Sep 23, 2009
If I find my girlfriend with another woman in a sexual act, I'd feel more disappointed than hurt. I bet she will have a juicy explanation for her action.
Re: Does It Hurt More Or Less? by Nobody: 5:21pm On Sep 23, 2009
Won't be me thatz going to be hurting, am not going to be the one being banged in the asshole lipsrsealed

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