SirWere:
Most people would advice you that true love conquers all and sh.it like that.....







But on a real life basis; it rarely does





But wait; the guy's a good guy and you really like him





Then I'll advice (the guy not you) to make some cool dough and propose to you; in front of your parents; with the ring placed in the middle of an Iphone 7 and galaxy S7 that is on the roof of the toyota Highlander 2016 model.






If they still say no then...................Bleep it; you've got one life to live

jnrbayano:
They saw ominous signs. I saw them too.

It hurts, but you have to do what you must do.

You can't afford not to be on the same page with people that brought you to this world as regards to marriage. You just can't afford to.

Unless their reasons are victimizing (which are not from what you outlined) please by every means, obey them.

Take heart and cheer up.

Luckygurl:
Wow!!
This is a difficult situation I don't pray to find myself in.

I really don't know what to say
If only our parents can be a little more understanding atimes
I would have suggested you involve some respected persons to intervene, but you already did, your grandparents at that and they are still adamant.

But one thing is sure, I can't get married to someone my parents ain't in full support.
This is not too good

Op! Try a bit harder to convince them, go extra miles for them to see reason with you.
If it doesn't work out, I'm sorry.
You might have to let go

Peacefullove:
Op , this is no doubt a difficult situation. and I think it won't have hurt so much if you had ended it the first time they kicked against it .

the family background of a thing is serious at times . they might have say this due to EXPERIENCES they have seen or hear over the years .

Put yourself in their position and your daughter is about to make such a decision considering those factors they gave , what will you do ?

sometimes its good to see things from the angle of the other person.

Ebullient07:


Thnks ma'am for d advice. As regrds goin an extra mile to convince them, I spoke wit a pastor abt it two years back nd she said deir concern is valid and not out of place and also dat d problem wit d bro's wife does not concern my boyfriend (she said he'd only be affected if d lady was his sister though I dnt know how true dis is medically). she insructed me to keep prayin abt it which I've bin doin. Even though it's bin a hard tin to do, I hve called off d relationship wen it got to d point where my mum had to openly embaras me on sunday.

Ebullient07:


It hurts pretty bad but I do get ur point. Thnks for ur advice. But contrary to wat d poster above u pointed out, dis is one person who strives nd prays hard not to mke any of d mistkes his parents made but den wat do I know. I just pray to get it right cos to my parents, I'm bin heady which is not quite d case. I dnt wnt to mke any mistake at dis point cos it may come to haunt me later in mind.

jnrbayano:


Do you know one thing about God's will? It must come to pass, no matter how the odds are stacked. Please, let it be a solace.

What I can beat my chest and tell you is that obeying one's parents is divine. Hope you know its a commandment?

But God's will overrides all remember? You see why I advice for it to be a solace?

Be strong.

Ebullient07:


I'm trying to see things from deir perspective but wat if they're wrong

Holywizard:
ur 1st issue might turn out to be an slowpoke

Ebullient07:


GueSs dat's wat u wish for ursef.

Flickzvill:
Follow your heart yes I agree u have to obey you parent and all that see one day dey will definitely leave u and join dia ancestors lets assume u marry a diff person just to please ur parent and ur not happy u are only killing ur self see for me o I will marry who I love once dey see tinz going well children everywhere me nd my wife progressing dey will forget d past that's it and also consult God first very important.

jnrbayano:


When you obey your parents (especially when they advice you out of their love, vast experience and clear dangers evident) you have already consulted God (After all, it's what God commands)

"Follow your heart" advice is never a good advice. The heart, a member of the affective domain, is unable to make an informed judgement outside the subject, love.

......and you know love is only but a subset of marriage. Marriage is a complex union.

"Follow your brain" is a better advice I reckon, why?

The brain is a cognitive tool which centres on logics and reason. With this, unthreatening or ominous signs are unblinkingly spotted, and decisions for or against made unimpeded.

May I also remind you that when two come together in marriage, their families also come together in marriage.

However, there's "God will" in everything as I pointed out earlier. It will always prevail no matter how the odds are stacked.

Flickzvill:
sir everyone has his/her own opinion my own is its better I follow my heart if worst comes to worst no p I take d blame and move on that's life we are all humans irrespective of the fact we have parents yes they are dia to guide us correct but as a matured person you have to take some certain decisions yourself let d parent allow her get married if she feels she loves him and he loves her no p my advice to dem dey should be prayerful and give reasons y her parent should give dem dia blessings dey have huge load of work to do so still follow your heart

jnrbayano:


When you obey your parents (especially when they advice you out of their love, vast experience and clear dangers evident) you have already consulted God (After all, it's what God commands)

"Follow your heart" advice is never a good advice. The heart, a member of the affective domain, is unable to make an informed judgement outside the subject, love.

......and you know love is only but a subset of marriage. Marriage is a complex union.

"Follow your brain" is a better advice I reckon, why?

The brain is a cognitive tool which centres on logics and reason. With this, unthreatening or ominous signs are unblinkingly spotted, and decisions for or against made unimpeded.

May I also remind you that when two come together in marriage, their families also come together in marriage.

However, there's "God will" in everything as I pointed out earlier. It will always prevail no matter how the odds are stacked.