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Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her - Romance - Nairaland

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Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by divalishis: 12:53pm On Jan 23, 2010
I’ve always been a fan of Nairaland, but av neva posted till now. This issue is more than me and I truly do not know how to resolve it. I am in a relationship with a guy I love very much! But this same guy is killing me slowly with his attitude. He is a Beyonce fanatic. He has all her movies, all her songs, uses her for his ringing tone and caller tunes, infact beyonce pops up in everything we do or say! Even when we have sex, he plays her songs and a poster of beyonce in a bikini smiles down at us from his wall and a lot of time, I have caught him looking at her poster during sex instead of me. HE is beyond obsessed.
3 years ago, I went to his bank to pay in some money. The first thing he told me was, You’re so beautiful, has someone ever told you u look like beyonce. He got my number and that was when we started our relationship.
So we’ve been together for 3 years plus now.
When we had been together for a while, he told me to dye my hair blond, that he would pay for the maintenance. I tried it (vowing to go black if I didn’t like the color) but I loved the new color, people loved it too. Then he came on with the stilettos that I would look better and classier with them that Beyonce always wears them…and he made sure he bought me a lot of them for me. I loved all the attention at first, but more recently, he began to point out to me Beyonce’s videos and shape, lamenting that if only I had her kind of butt, that there were stretchmarks on mine. He said I should gain more weight in my hips. He also told me I was looking darker now, amongst other things. And I seriously suspect when we make love, he’s fantasizing about her.
I work hard to keep in shape and I look hour-glassy, and I seriously don’t want to gain any weight. Cos av been overweight once, and it wasn’t easy getting to where am at! Moreover, its daft for him to think the weight gained would go straight to my hips…more likely its going to end up in my belly!
Now, am sick and tired of the whole scenario. Of him trying to turn me into a beyonce zombie! The constant stiletto wearing is killing my knees, my bleached hair has lost its gloss and is horribly damaged and I now use weaves 24/7/365. the last time I went to fix fake eyelashes(at his suggestion) the glue got into my eye and almost blinded me….am sick and tired cos I look in the mirror I don’t see my pretty self anymore. I see someone being forced to be someone she’s not. I want to be natural the way I was before we got involved. My friends think am over reacting and I should consider myself lucky he loves me, pays the bills and takes care of me. I don’t know what to do cos he is my first love and I have invested 3 years of my life with him. Moreover, I’m not so confident anymore as my confidence has plummeted. I’m so withdrawn now! He talks marriage, but I don’t know if I can cope especially if he continues this way!
If I hear beyonce one more time…I just might go gaga! undecided
Re: Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by Nobody: 1:07pm On Jan 23, 2010
"Hugs"  sad

O you poor dear sad looks like this relationship has taken its toil on your self esteem and self worth. You cant look like Beyonce because Beyonce doesnt even look like Beyonce when she wakes up in the morning. She has her makeup/hair team, air brushers, workout team, stylists, dieticians etc. Her image is unrealistic and your bf is out of his head to make you try to be like her even if it damages you(unhealthy hair, low self esteem and painful legs etc).

I think you should talk to him, say everything you have stated here and if he still insists then you should leave the relationship because if you continue like this, things will get worst until you lose yourself completely.
Re: Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by Mannylex(m): 1:08pm On Jan 23, 2010
Eya, I really feel for u, so we have these kind of guys in naija. This is wat I call living in bondage.
Re: Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by Spyker: 1:22pm On Jan 23, 2010
Poster, have you ever tried to tell him your mind, how you feel about this obsession of his in Beyonce? If you don't, start now. It is never too late to correct certain attitude you cannot live with in a relationship otherwise the day you marry him and start dressing like a married woman, the way Nigerian women dress, he will run after another beyonce looking figure in the street.

Make your stand now, it is better you loose 3 years than live in bondage all your life. A word is enough for the wise.
Re: Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by Mannylex(m): 1:28pm On Jan 23, 2010
ebony has said it all, talk 2 him tell him u're nw a shadow of urself, , ,if he truly luvs u, he'll com bak 2 his senses
Re: Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by kay9(m): 1:31pm On Jan 23, 2010
grin grin grin grin Tell your BF to go marry beyonce!
Re: Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by lovemoi2(f): 2:08pm On Jan 23, 2010
[size=14pt]does you boyfriend dress like beyonce too grin grin grin[/size]
haha seems like someone is sleeping with a dragqueen
Re: Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by Skidoc(m): 2:31pm On Jan 23, 2010
Lol, tales by moonlight. smiley
Re: Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by elecktra(f): 2:56pm On Jan 23, 2010
hey bee divalish tell your boyfriend to go all black everything like jay-z too at least that ll balance the hollywood hot couple

image he is tryna create. . . . . . ur boyfriend needs serious rehab o thats over the top obsession. . .real beyonce better hide else this man ll stalk her life

and kidnap her . my advise for you ; be yourself, dont live your life for someone else or by what he thinks its your life not his,what happens when you marry

him and you loose all the phony beyonce image ?? he dumps you to look for another beyounce lipsrsealed lipsrsealed lipsrsealed
Re: Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by IykeD(m): 3:14pm On Jan 23, 2010
Give us his phone number so that we can call him and let him know.
Re: Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by safeact(m): 3:41pm On Jan 23, 2010
Hahahaha! I laugh in naija style. Chincho ho ho ku, in chinese style. D worst thing that would happen 2u is live a fake life, how long will it last?
Re: Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by Flashfast1: 4:52pm On Jan 23, 2010
hmmmmm, na wa o.
Make you too tell am to be like JayZ
Re: Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by Nobody: 7:22pm On Jan 23, 2010
Quit. Run for your dear life!!!

[s]Think with your brain not your heart.[/s]
Re: Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by ginky: 7:47pm On Jan 23, 2010
Dis kain boy friend/fiancee can make some1 hav inferiority complex. Even d beyonce we see on tv is nt all dat. She's jus 5feet 6,got fairer wit some skin lytinin creams, has short hair dat luks quite discolord(uses hair extensions evry tym) and generally, IS NOT ALL THAT BEAUTIFUL WITHOUT MAKEUP. Pls oh, tell him 2 go out with d real beyonce cuz u obviously are not her. Anyway,its up 2 u. I wudn't b suprisd if he expects ur tummy to stil b flat even when ur pregnant.
Re: Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by ginky: 7:48pm On Jan 23, 2010
Dis kain boy friend/fiancee can make some1 hav inferiority complex. Even d beyonce we see on tv is nt all dat. She's jus 5feet 6,got fairer wit some skin lytinin creams, has short hair dat luks quite discolord(uses hair extensions evry tym) and generally, IS NOT ALL THAT BEAUTIFUL WITHOUT MAKEUP. Pls oh, tell him 2 go out with d real beyonce cuz u obviously are not her. Anyway,its up 2 u. I wudn't b suprisd if he expects ur tummy to stil b flat even when ur pregnant.
Re: Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by ssumpta(f): 12:55am On Jan 24, 2010
lol.
@ Poster.U've lost urself in this relationship.
Wont be long before he eyes anoda B lookalike and dumps your sorry low-self-esteem arse.
wat do u expect when he chose to date u in d first place based on ur looks.
I'm sure ur head nearly exploded wen he told u dt u look like beyonce. Sorry!
Re: Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by lovemoi2(f): 12:59am On Jan 24, 2010
haha funny thread, my almost to be ex boo actually thinks i am better looking than beyonce grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin grin
hopefully the new guy i will date wunt think differently hahaha
Re: Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by Nobody: 1:04am On Jan 24, 2010
rotflmao. . . . funny a$$ thread. . . . grin
Wouldnt want to be you right now. . . . dont know what to say mehn. The "You're getting too dark" part scares me, you better dont bleach yourself grin



A man that's [i]that [/i]obsessed with beyonce is. . . . NVM lol
Re: Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by Hotstepper(f): 1:37am On Jan 24, 2010
my dear, since he wants u 2 be like B., why dont u tell him who u want him to be, get a very sexy celebrity,
Maybe by doing so, he will get 2 his senses
Re: Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by Outstrip(f): 5:19am On Jan 24, 2010
Sorry but your boyfriend is mentally unbalanced. I don't mean it as an insult. beyonce ke, beyonce ni. Does he have Jay Z's money? Mscheeeeeeeeeeeew
Re: Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by unban190: 5:40am On Jan 24, 2010
post
please help me ask your BF this question

if he has seen what happen to the guy in mariah carey's song OBSESSED the same thing would happen to him
if he dosent take off his mind off beyonce

wait let JAY-Z catch him
Re: Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by divalishis: 1:10pm On Jan 24, 2010
"Hugs" Sad

O you poor dear Sad looks like this relationship has taken its toil on your self esteem and self worth. You cant look like Beyonce because Beyonce doesnt even look like Beyonce when she wakes up in the morning. She has her makeup/hair team, air brushers, workout team, stylists, dieticians etc. Her image is unrealistic and your bf is out of his head to make you try to be like her even if it damages you(unhealthy hair, low self esteem and painful legs etc).

I think you should talk to him, say everything you have stated here and if he still insists then you should leave the relationship because if you continue like this, things will get worst until you lose yourself completely.

@Ebonyeyes-Thanx smiley
Thanx to everybody too.

Somethin happened though. I neva knew he comes on nairaland, and last nite, he called me to accuse me of what I wrote here. I cudnt deny it, We are supposed to see this afternoon, I don't know what he wants to say, but he didnt sound too happy.
Re: Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by Nobody: 3:15pm On Jan 24, 2010
its good then.

now you can talk abt it.

you should never lose urself in a relationship
if he really cares about you he should be concerned that you are losing your confidence, its better you settle this now or next thread will 'where can i get butt enlargement'
Re: Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by sweetpie23: 6:04pm On Jan 24, 2010
wow your BF is really sick in the head
Re: Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by kcblast(m): 6:22pm On Jan 24, 2010
Well cry,he aint just sick,he's extraordinaryly insane angry , but if d relationship is disturbing ur damn mind, just cut it off undecided
Re: Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by agabaI23(m): 6:30pm On Jan 24, 2010
Hotstepper:

my dear, since he wants u 2 be like B., why dont u tell him who u want him to be, get a very sexy celebrity,
Maybe by doing so, he will get 2 his senses

Yes!
Re: Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by sophy09: 6:45pm On Jan 24, 2010
My dear I will blame you ooo. when he was asking to do all that stuff you know talk na now you come dey complain. you should have told him from the start that you were not the kind of girl to do stuff like that. but anyway sha you better tell or you leave.
Re: Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by Wislet(f): 9:05am On Jan 25, 2010
It's a good thing he has seen wat all this is doing to you. And if he is wise he'll address it like someone that has something in-between his ears. Please keep us posted on the finale, How unhealthily obsessed can some people become! , pitiful.
Re: Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by Nobody: 1:35pm On Jan 25, 2010
Go listen to what he's got to say.If his decision doesn't suit you,back out.You can to be like somebody else but u cant be that person.And why for God sake will u try to be like some1 else.Try and be urself.
Forget abt 3yrs ooo it's not hw far but hw well.
Re: Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by Kgdavid(m): 2:41pm On Jan 25, 2010
This is really not cool, pls don't feel intimidated when you have your talk with this guy. God has a reason for making you who you are and not Beyonce. If he can't love you just the way you are then leave him, after all you have already gone to ridiculous lengths to please him. keep us posted on the situation
Re: Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by jumaingirl(f): 4:32pm On Jan 25, 2010
Eyah. Pele tie
Re: Help! Pls Tell My Fiance I Am Not Beyonce & He Shud Stop Forcin Me To Be Lyk Her by ayettymama(f): 4:36pm On Jan 25, 2010
lol i didnt even bother to read the loooong story,

but i suggest u dump ur fiance and tell him to go marry beyonce,

he obviously watches too much television if it matters to him soo much!!

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