Watchout for this space!!! Na pidgin my experience go be oooo...but una go enjoy am.

Make i go drink my beer first!!! Mind you, na for dubai i learnt how to take beer and cigarettes ooo!!!

Subscribed!

Oya fire on

I have parked my Bus here like Morinho

Ngwanu

Following

where is the OP

Booked

queengift:
where is the OP

Still taking his beer lol

Isn't a sin for a woman to park here too......am parking with one trailer.....I don't want to occupy too much space

One Bottle please

Let me chill here with my Black Label. Na Ororo sure pass, make my eyes no just dey wide open unnecessarily

.......

Me: Driver abeg abeg drop me here
Driver: No o, no bus stop here o
Me: Op dey collect beer for that beer parlour make I come down abeg
Driver: E b like say you no dey here me, no bus stop here
Me: (frowns, change to my abero voice) Alaye put me down make I no give you problem
Driver: OK OK come down
Me: change
Driver: you no get change
Me: #50 n I never reach my DESTINATION, #10 or we die here

Speeding inside the thread in my 2003 corolla!!!! Revs engine hard and finally park. Waiting for OP

You guys eh

Where this Op na
Comman update us sharp sharp.

Na wah oo

Since I don dey wait for this op for Dubai under bridge

Make i park my keke for here

Following

Go on

This place go make sense ooo, make I sit down jejely

I can relate.

Smiles.

Canadanow:
It all happened when i sat down at home one day and was reading through autojosh’s or someone else’s thread about how beautiful dubai is...then i started my research...
Some people advised not to come while some agents started convincing everyone to try it out...
But that was none if my business because i have someone that could help with the visa processing and all...i was having only 700k in my business account ooo...after a failed transport business...
Had the visa done in 2 days for just 160k, but i swear down, i no happy for my mind ooooo, na so we be for our house, if something no go work out, our mind go dey tell us not to do it. But because my mama no like the way i dey sidon for house dey do nothing, she had to push me to pay for the ticket...

i wont be telling you the real date i left Naija because some people go sabi sey na me and na lowkey me dey ooo....
I was supposed to book my ticket Nov 15th but person go spend my money for my business account, na xo i left Dec 13th ooo, few days to xmas. First time I would be away from home. My passport na virgin passport!!!
If you see wetin my eye see for naija airport!!! I gave out over 7k as per bribe...I had to check-in laptop because of the immigration wahala...
Mind you, i didnt attestate any result because i heard dem dey do am for dubai/abu dhabi and i packed all my clothes and shoes and had the plan of never coming back to naija in the next 2 years...
I don put my car ontop market sef sey make dem sell am, send the money to me in dubai...thank God dem no see am sell but the person i give am to don use am tire because he thought i was never coming back!!! I just realised why he said he no see am sell!!!
Na xo i enter emirates airline ooo...as a first time traveller, dem give us food menu, i begin dey see names i no understand, i dey reason sey na me go pick wetin i go chop but i dey shy to talk!!! Na xo i sit for window seat dey use style take pictures to send to my friends and family, na dem cast me to other people sey i don go obodo-oyinbo ooo...me wey no like make people sabi where i dey!!!
As a bush yoruba boy wey i be, and as i get craze for head reach, i no do gra-gra inside plane ooo...i just dey quiet dey watch movie for the screen wey dey infront of me!!! Emirates airline na better airline sha!!!
As dem give us appetizers for inside plane, i just dey look am like rubbish!!! Wetin be this? I sha manage am ooo...my 269k for return ticket no go waste like that ooo, na xo dem carry jollof rice with some useless things come, it was funny, before i go chop anything, i go watch the small guy beside me wey dey with his mum how to eat it ooo, make i no go Bleep up!!!

Make i move my story fast...na xo we land for dubai oooo...terminal 3. I was so happy mehn!!! Con see how dem use bus carry us from the aircraft to the terminal where our passport was stamped!!! Me sef wear footwear, put on denim like a big-boy wey bring $1500 come dubai to look for a better life!!!
I never told you we were two but my friend was coming 2 days after i got to dubai so i had to wait for him in a hotel i booked online.

The girl that came to pick me was his sister...na xo i exchanged just $500 and was asking if i should exchange everything oooo...

We entered taxi and the Pakistan guy no sabi use google map, we sha spent 56dirhams on a 15mins trip from the airport!!! Thats 5600naira
I dey speak English, this people no understand me...until this girl started speaking English like she dey sing...imagine something like...(my friend, how much coming?)
You wan know price, you dey ask how much coming...who is coming?
Got to the hotel or shey na hostel, 200dhs per night for two people. For people wey no sabi the exchange rate, that 20k naira per night. 1dirham is 100naira!!!
I just had to book that because my friend would be coming and the hotel could get filled up!!! All na scam!!!
Me wey no dey chat on WhatsApp started telling everyone how our government bleeped up, they should come see how dubai is...but that part where i dey looked like lekki!!! Thats funny, i know!!! Na xo my suffering start, the girl don comot and i had to give her 50dhs for cab coz metro was done for the day. I didnt even know the exchange rate, i just told her to take... even if she asked for 100dhs, i go give her easily!!!
Na 2am and she no fit sleep with me!!! You arent allowed to sleep in the hotel with someone wey no be your wife!!!

Imagine, person wey be like a blood sister to me!!!
Wetin i go chop like this, i no sabi anywhere ooo...luckily Lulu mall dey around, i went shopping, coke wey i dey buy for 150 naira in naija na 475naira in dubai. Chaiii...dubai coke is better niyen!!!
I just saw one KFC restaurant and went in to buy rice and chicken, i no sabi sey KFC na international nah... i dey reason dem go get our friend and jollof rice, silly me...
Took the food to the hotel and it was a mess, na only the chicken i was able to eat, the rice dey taste like coconut...na die i dey ooo...



To be continued once my mood changes...coz i no get myself!!! Me wey dey fight depression before con put myself for such bullsh**t!!!
After selling my gold after i got back, planning on selling another one soon just to settle my bills but i won’t lie to you guys, i have peace of mind oooo...more than anything!!! I no miss UAE at all!!!
You all will know why soon...no vex sey i no fit write everything at once ooo...

[quote author=adventurez post=86123224]I can relate.

Smiles.

[/quot

You would have visited a pastor for prayers for successful journey

Canadanow:
Sorry i was really busy getting myself together after spending over 1M in dubai in a month and coming back with nothing to nothing!!!
It wasnt more than a month but it was more than 5 years in my eye...

If i start to talk about wetin my eye don see, you no go believe. Me no too suffer that much ooo but i go still tell una from other people’s point of view.

My brothers and sisters, our people dey suffer for dubai!!! Our people dey suffer sotey...dem dey go pack wey people no chop finish for that boat cruise!!!

Oya, back to the topic, i would start with the day i left naija!!! Please if you wanna ask me anything, always quote me!!!
And if any agent comes here to say because it didnt work for me, that doesnt mean e no go work for anyone else, i go curse him/her...

[quote author=Asquare84 post=86124972][/quote] so na prayers make am come back . Naija and religion

I am enjoying this story sha o
Op please no keep us waiting much o

I pack on corner dy observe... Abeg OP no stay long.

.. Op come update oo