Am lost, don’t know what to do, I lost my job for no good reason,
I am dejected and I blame God for everything, taking a walk on the railway track in a cool lonely area,

Thinking of all the promises of God to guide and love us, my mind is roaming far, unaware of my surroundings, oh my God a train behind me! Its horns blaring, I can’t hear or see it,

That is the end of my suffering on earth, I shall go and see my Father and ask him why he brought so much suffering to me, the train comes nearer and I suddenly come to reality, tool late! Suddenly, someone pushes me off the rail track, I fall unhurt and safe, the train passes and I am unhurt, who is it? I look back and front and see nobody, I did not hear nor see the train coming, why all this?

Suddenly I remember a passage in the bible, “FOR HE SHALL SEND HIS ANGELS TO TAKE CHARGE OF YOU, ONE BY YOUR RIGHT THE OTHER BY YOUR LEFT AND YOUR FEET SHALL NOT STRIKE THE STONE”,

it must have been an Angel, why? I lost my job and have no more hope, suddenly I realize that God loves me and though I have no job and have lost hope he still cares and loves me,

I suddenly smile because all hopes are not yet lost , I know He has something in store for me, you who are at loss and don’t know what to do put your faith in God, HE IS THE ALPHA AND THE OMEGA THE BEGINNING AND THE END, THE AUTHOR AND THE FINISHER, you out there who has lost hope smile because things will change for the better.

Since this i presume is your very first poem that you've publicly displayed, i'd say you gave it a good go - i'm feeling you; i literally feel the emotions seep thru your veins unto the paper. but like everything else, you've g'otta plan your poem first - writing poems is pretty much similar to solving a math problem.

when the idea comes into your conscious, yu just don't write it once and bam thats it ! you write, re-write, edit, make adjustments here and there, until its got a fine balance. you need to pick just the right words that fit in the right places - words that clearly tell your message.
it took shakespeare years + tonnes of paper and ink to write all he'd written; he didn't just write 'em in a handful of days!

you were pretty much writing a story-book here - some of these are a wee too long. if you have to read this in a recitation, there'll be problems.

all the same man, you tried; just keep it up - try to read poems by others - amateurs and pros alike, you'll learn some tricks of the trade !

thnks Bro for the sincere advice you given me. I will post some other one. So you take a look at it and give me your verdict. Thnks alot.

sounds like sum'tin that should be in the religious forum?but then again since its your first poem you did a good job and theres room for improovement,keep doing what you are doing!