Your sister was in her early 20s when she was gotten pregnant by this man and your parent got him arrested.... After that you still expect him to reach out to you people after the humiliation?

My question; you said your sister did not reach out.... Did you at any time tried reaching out to her?

@op, the man impregnated your sister your dad beat him up & arrested him. Your father has the right to be bittered.
Your sister claims she loves the man with the whole of her life, & she decided to moved in with the love of her life,even without getting married legally.
The man on the other end is angry how ur family mistreated him, so also your sister, but that shouldn't be a yardstick for the man to kidnapped someone else daughter unlawfully without doing the right thing.
The person to blame there is your sister, she is the one that decide to cut communication with her family.
First thing first is to find a way to communicate with your sister, try to kwn her well being & her present condition.
It's well oo !!!

NPTJ:
They were always informed about any family function. Not even to contribute money o. Just to show up and honour the invitation. He never did nor my sister. He always give excuse that he's broke but he always have money to attend his family functions. At times if my mum called him to speak with her daughter. He'd say he travelled home for this and that. Not until he arrived home before she can speak with her

That's the problem when a small girl thinks she is old enough to handle issues. Okpolo eye no be open eye. That guy has really taken advantage of her. She wanted to go to school and cldnt concentrate on gathering the money she needed to use. She is not just serious and so unfocused . She simply saw marriage as a shortcut out of her issues not knowing it was deadly and death trap. I ll advise that you guys pray for her from a distance for now that God would take control of her mind.. With that she can now start trying to get in touch with you guys.

You need reset your sister head small ooo

NPTJ:
Good morning house

The only sister i and my other siblings had met a Man around 2008. He's from Imo state, a deportee from Germany who was in his late 40s when they met. My sister was just out of high school then and struggling to secure admission into any of the tertiary institutions. Luckily, she got admission to study law at Unilag after her second attempt. Sadly, there was no money to process the admission, she lost it. She was the first and only daughter of our parents. My parents were incapacitated financially to support her dream

My father never wanted her to work then, for guys not to take advantage of her or something. Having lost the admission, she insisted to work inorder to raise money for her studies. My dad got no option than to obliged

She met this man barely a year she started working. She was in her early 20s and full of dreams. Lest I forget, she was staying with our grand mother due to distance. This man got my sister pregnant and we got to hear about it. My dad got the man arrested and beat the hell out of my sister. He wept bitterly claiming this isn't the life he envisioned for his only daughter

He beseeched her and talk sense into her but she insisted, claiming she loved the man. This man was deported after spending almost half of his productive years outside the shores of Nigeria. He came back home with nothing and the next thing he could do was to got my sister pregnant claiming he loves her beyond words

My sister moved in with him and they started living together. We lost our grand parents (paternal and maternal) Yet, this man and my sister never stepped their foot in our house to commesorate. I lost my eldest brother, same thing happened. They never showed up. I was the 4th child of five children. Though, only four left now. She hardly call our parents nor we her siblings. To cap it all, my sister had stopped using phone ever since she moved to pourtharcourt with this man

This same man always attend his family function and very much into his family but isolated my sister away from her family. My sister never called throughout my days in the university just to know how I'm fairing, despite knowing our family condition. A very close friend of mine noticed this while in school and i did explained everything to him. He felt so bittered. He asserted the man might be diabolic, he's from the same town with the man in imo state

My parents are in their early/late 60s respectively and aging gradually. They couldn't felt the presence of their only daughter. Interestingly, family members got suspicious and they kept asking after her but my parents are bent on covering up, claiming she's fine. Yet, they goes to their closets to cry bitterly for the life of their daughter. I asked my dad why covering up, he claimed to have known his family pretty well, that they would do nothing

I'm just a young graduate, still job haunting. While my elder brother is gainfully employed with 50k as his monthly take home. He's being supportive with day to day running of the house and that of our last born studies. A friend suggested myself and elder brother with any of our uncle should go and treat the man's fvckup for eloping with someone's daughter without paying her bride price nor any other marital rite. I told him that isn't feasible for now due to our poor finances.

Nonetheless, we can't continue folding our hands and watch this man get away with this. She is the only daughter of our parents. Her presence is highly needed in their life, especially my mother

Please what can we do to make things work for my family back? I can't imagine having a sister who's more like a living dead

Any help, input or suggestions from anyone!

She got pregnant, you beat her and arrested the man, I am sure you beat him up first and humiliated him and I am sure he suffered in jail,

Finally your sister is with him, if it’s you will you want to associate with the family?

You still want to go and beat him up again, I laugh, you guys are not even ready.

See everything for life no be gragra

Kobojunkie:
Your entire family is barely managing still and you are trying to chase down your sister why? So she can come provide you support where she probably has none of her own or so you can simply say she calls you?

Even if we are drinking garri that doesn't mean we shouldn't know what's right and wrong

The rest of us are all boys who would got married someday. We all see what the man does as something totally wrong

Janetjim1:



Omo, this is more of the spiritual than the physical! I believe you should know what to do.




My signature!

Seriously do you really need to quote op , why not reply him than giving us all this ...

Spanishmilf:
bro please read before you comment
Don’t showcase your stupidity on a open forum just scroll and pass

Show me that you are not the stupid in this case by responding to the questions in the comment there.

NPTJ:
Even if we are drinking garri that doesn't mean we shouldn't know what's right and wrong

The rest of us are all boys who would got married someday. We all see what the man does as something totally wrong

You see what the man does meaning you also see your sister too?

You keep making it seem as though you are aware of where you sister is, only that she does not seem to regard you all. If this is correct it means your sister choses this for herself, does it not?

Didi2d:
You guys should find a way to locate your Sister, at least to know how she's faring.

She might be going through hell right now. But due to the way and manner she left she might find it hard to let you guys know. Probably cause of shame.

Your family should check on your sister ASAP

Seems you don't know how coercive men and in love women can be. He says she begged them to let her take her two kids and go live with the man. She's doing well.

NPTJ:
Those friends too were bothered believing that man is behind all these. But my parents are too ashamed to speak out to them. My dad still talk to her through the man's phone three days ago to know what is wrong with her. My dad spoke with the man and he keeps giving flimsy excuses about the bigger amount he pays for his children school fees and others. My dad asked him was that the reason you couldn't get your wife even a small touch light phone so she can reach her family? Was that the reason why you eloped with her and she never come to visit her family not even when her brother and grandparents died? He was just dumbfounded and keep saying he's sorry

How old is your sister? How old is the man?

She's enjoyed a decade with him, why are you trying to separate their love? It's clearly what they both want that's going on.

Pay them a visit with your elders, warn him with police

dapolaw:
Your sister was in her early 20s when she was gotten pregnant by this man and your parent got him arrested.... After that you still expect him to reach out to you people after the humiliation?

My question; you said your sister did not reach out.... Did you at any time tried reaching out to her?

Several times. Through the husband phone since she doesn't have her own phone. But most times, the man is not always around to speak with her. We'd have to wait till he get back home and she doesn't give us any sign of she's not fine

TheGoodJoe:
Your sister is a grown-up woman. Let her live her life the way she wants. Move on.

absolute rubbish. Move on as though he never had a sister? Move on as though her sister only sister does not matter? Move on as though he can't do nothing to see his only sister is fine and alright? What the Bleep has happened to us?

hopeforcharles:
Pay them a visit with your elders, warn him with police

Why? It she has chosen to stay with him since 2008, what legal right does anyone have to send the cops to them?

Hmm. I give OP ten to fifteen years before he’ll realize everybody in life has their own path. At this rate it may take twenty years.

He can be sued.

Cashio:
absolute rubbish. Move on as though he never had a sister? Move on as though her sister only sister does not matter? Move on as though he can't do nothing to see his only sister is fine and alright? What the Bleep has happened to us?

First he needs to accept his sister's choice. Respecting this, the family can then approach her in ways that will not further drive a wedge between them.

NPTJ:
Good morning house

The only sister i and my other siblings had met a Man around 2008. He's from Imo state, a deportee from Germany who was in his late 40s when they met. My sister was just out of high school then and struggling to secure admission into any of the tertiary institutions. Luckily, she got admission to study law at Unilag after her second attempt. Sadly, there was no money to process the admission, she lost it. She was the first and only daughter of our parents. My parents were incapacitated financially to support her dream

My father never wanted her to work then, for guys not to take advantage of her or something. Having lost the admission, she insisted to work inorder to raise money for her studies. My dad got no option than to obliged

She met this man barely a year she started working. She was in her early 20s and full of dreams. Lest I forget, she was staying with our grand mother due to distance. This man got my sister pregnant and we got to hear about it. My dad got the man arrested and beat the hell out of my sister. He wept bitterly claiming this isn't the life he envisioned for his only daughter

He beseeched her and talk sense into her but she insisted, claiming she loved the man. This man was deported after spending almost half of his productive years outside the shores of Nigeria. He came back home with nothing and the next thing he could do was to got my sister pregnant claiming he loves her beyond words

My sister moved in with him and they started living together. We lost our grand parents (paternal and maternal) Yet, this man and my sister never stepped their foot in our house to commesorate. I lost my eldest brother, same thing happened. They never showed up. I was the 4th child of five children. Though, only four left now. She hardly call our parents nor we her siblings. To cap it all, my sister had stopped using phone ever since she moved to pourtharcourt with this man

This same man always attend his family function and very much into his family but isolated my sister away from her family. My sister never called throughout my days in the university just to know how I'm fairing, despite knowing our family condition. A very close friend of mine noticed this while in school and i did explained everything to him. He felt so bittered. He asserted the man might be diabolic, he's from the same town with the man in imo state

My parents are in their early/late 60s respectively and aging gradually. They couldn't felt the presence of their only daughter. Interestingly, family members got suspicious and they kept asking after her but my parents are bent on covering up, claiming she's fine. Yet, they goes to their closets to cry bitterly for the life of their daughter. I asked my dad why covering up, he claimed to have known his family pretty well, that they would do nothing

I'm just a young graduate, still job haunting. While my elder brother is gainfully employed with 50k as his monthly take home. He's being supportive with day to day running of the house and that of our last born studies. A friend suggested myself and elder brother with any of our uncle should go and treat the man's fvckup for eloping with someone's daughter without paying her bride price nor any other marital rite. I told him that isn't feasible for now due to our poor finances.

Nonetheless, we can't continue folding our hands and watch this man get away with this. She is the only daughter of our parents. Her presence is highly needed in their life, especially my mother

Please what can we do to make things work for my family back? I can't imagine having a sister who's more like a living dead

Any help, input or suggestions from anyone!

You all are not doing a good job of taking care of your sister and you seem to think that it’s easy for her to just walk away from a man she claims to love. You have not walked in her shoes so you should not judge but pray for her. Do you know that majority of women stay in relationships like this because of their kids? Also try not worry about the man’s deportation and those other stuffs. Those were his cross to carry.
So, reach out to your sister and ask her what you can do to make her happy and pray for her as well. Good luck!

If only you hacken to this simple advice dt will not cause a dime!!! Take ur case to Zion ministry ground in Lagos and see wanders. You are very luck u stay in Lagos. Try and see. Your in-law must pay for using a diabolical means to take an only daughter away from her family.

lilvicky68:

When did Christ embassy start conducting deliverance services? with their phonetics..

Na better die by fire church she need

lol

NPTJ:
Those friends too were bothered believing that man is behind all these. But my parents are too ashamed to speak out to them. My dad still talk to her through the man's phone three days ago to know what is wrong with her. My dad spoke with the man and he keeps giving flimsy excuses about the bigger amount he pays for his children school fees and others. My dad asked him was that the reason you couldn't get your wife even a small touch light phone so she can reach her family? Was that the reason why you eloped with her and she never come to visit her family not even when her brother and grandparents died? He was just dumbfounded and keep saying he's sorry

This is serious. Your parents should try and visit. Inviting them over to your family house is the ideal approach but visiting is the most appropriate way to understand their living condition. All is certainly not well.

Poverty killer of so many dreams....

Bro... you can take the horse to the water but you can't make him drink. what you need to find out is if she's there against her will ... by force/threat/blackmail. If that's the case then you can save enough to rent soldiers to locate him and give him a beat down that must lead to hospitalization and the loss of a few teeth with a stern warning that should he ever make an attempt to contact her or have any communication with her ... directly or indirectly... he will get the main course... that this little roughing up is just the appetizer. If it is that she wants to be with him ... there is nothing you.. your parents nor other family members can do to change that. Change will come in her time if she so desires. After all... she's a woman... wired differently ... don't even try to figure her out.

GO AND PRAY BRO, PRAYER WORKS. THIS SITUATION DOES NOT SEEM ORDINARY. YOU NEED SERIOUS PRAYES AND TAKE ACTIONS OF FAITH TOO. PRAY!

BRATISLAVA:


How old is your sister? How old is the man?

She's enjoyed a decade with him, why are you trying to separate their love? It's clearly what they both want that's going on.

This is not about seperation sir/ma

My mother never treated her parents nor siblings like that, same with my dad

The man was almost 50 when they met, while she was just 23 or something

I don't think igbo culture is like that

NPTJ:
We've once planned to visit her without their noticed. About three of us but we need to consider our pocket. Going and coming back isn't what we can cough out easily. Moreso, considering the fact that I'm still looking out for job. The burden will be too much on my elder brother

I'm sorry about what you all must be going through. Not knowing the whereabouts of your sister can be traumatizing.

I suggest you all forget all previous grudges and find a way to first meet with her and know how's she's fairing first and foremost.

She might be in danger for all we know.

I suggest the most logical and emotionally mature of you all should go first.. so as not escalate things. That should be one of you or your brother. Your parents may not be able to handle it well.

Your main goal is to get to know the safety of her and the kids. And dialogue with her on how she can be reunited with the family.

basically you guys are psychos and she has met a more sophisticated westernised man and she likes that civil westernised behavior and has chosen the civilised way. i mean you guys beat up a pregnant woman and arrest her husband and even today you are still talking about going there to do violence to a man who is nearly fifty now. i mean i dont blame anyone not wanting to associate with violent neanderthals. CASE CLOSED. move on with your lives. in due time she may come finding you but till then just move on

NPTJ:
This is not about seperation sir/ma

My mother never treated her parents nor siblings like that, same with my dad

The man was almost 50 when they met, while she was just 23 or something

I don't think igbo culture is like that

With those ages the man is closer to 60 now? What was wrong with your sister that at her young age she was roped in by a man on the run from the law abroad? What about his family over there? The age gap can give rise do control issues, but they both claim to be in love.

Your sister is old enough to know what she wants. Maybe she loves him. But one can't explain the phone calls that can only take place in his presence, unless he is controlling her? Or they agreed that she must never pick your calls ever.

Best believe they both don't want to contact you. If she's tired she knows the way back home. He isn't holding her hostage, is he? She sounds normal on the phone, doesn't she?

The man is obviously too old for her in the first place he is almost 50 years and your sister is in her 20s. He spent most of his youthful age overseas with absolutely nothing to show for it when he was deported. He was obviously bad news . When a man is far too old than a lady in marriage it becomes more of a father and daughter relationship with sex been the only different. Your sister is suffering from mental enslavement and finds it impossible to resist the old man because your father failed in his role has a father towards her, so subconsciously she kept searching for a father figure and fell prey to this old gago. Go find your sister first then you will know what next to do base on what you find.