Am barely three years into marraige, the least reason i got married to my wife was for making babies.
My wife is going through a family planning method, but my mum and inlaws wont let us drink water.
It is grand children this & grand children that'. Even my own mum i always thought was learned & invoke with 21st century lifestyle has been in the fore front of disturbing our lives.
My wife is barely 26 and pursuing her master's programme to a conclusion & i've been busy traveling & attending various courses to gain speedy promotion & hit the peak of my para-millitary job. Where else would i get the time to start baby-sitting, which i know is a full time job.
Am not just the type to let a house maid take up the responsibility of training my children, this i know has negative effects & may some day backfire.
My mum have even gone ahead to tag this the handi_work of witchcraft. My elder brother has 3kids already, why the cry after my own.
This women wont just let us live our lives in peace!

Welcome to Africa

Bants aside anyone who goes ahead to have a child in this shithole continent especially with the trajectory of how it's headed is a satanic demonic human being. Even the devilish politicians in Africa don't give birth to their kids here.

.

James4358:
Am barely three years into marraige, the least reason i got married to my wife was for making babies.
My wife is going through a family planning method, but my mum and inlaws wont let us drink water.
It is grand children this & grand children that'. Even my own mum i always thought was learned & invoke with 21st century lifestyle has been in the fore front of disturbing our lives.
My wife is barely 26 and pursuing her master's programme to a conclusion & i've been busy traveling & attending various courses to gain speedy promotion & hit the peak of my para-millitary job. Where else would i get the time to start baby-sitting, which i know is a full time job.
Am not just the type to let a house maid take up the responsibility of training my children, this i know has negative effects & may some day backfire.
My mum have even gone ahead to tag this the handi_work of witchcraft. My elder brother has 3kids already, why the cry after my own.
This women wont just let us live our lives in peace!

You need to have a one-on-one discussion with your mom explaining the reasons you don't want children at the moment - entirely different from you don't want children at all. If she is someone who respects numbers, show her stats and pictures elucidating reasons why wanton and sometimes, early fecundity is not the right thing. Calmly tell her and your in-laws the benefits of postponed childbearing and a limited number of children (two maximum) will do for the trio (them, your wife and you and children).

See my thread for more details: https://www.nairaland.com/6035550/nigerians-poverty-certain-acts-perpetuate

tensazangetsu20:
Bants aside anyone who goes ahead to have a child in this shithole continent especially with the trajectory of how it's headed is a satanic demonic human being. Even the devilish politicians in Africa don't give birth to their kids here.

To be fair, this will not stop people from procreating. The best advice is to birth children one can adequately take care of while preparing for the worst that will happen.

Family planning is a method used to space kids and allow a desired number of kids through contraception. What are you planning when you're not ready?

Your wife can be pregnant and still be doing her masters.

Your mom and MIL can take care of her when she gives birth.

It won't also stop you from chasing your career.

Why did you get married then, if you both won't have time for each other?

I'm not attacking you bro, I'm just advising you. Both parents mean well for you guys.

It is our tradition that when you get married, the next is children. Children are blessings. Don't be afraid to have one.

Open your mouth and tell them it is what you want and have decided to do, damn whatever they have to say or do, they will never understand you and your point.
Do this to give yourself rest of mind and most importantly your wife, because with time the attention and pressure will be on her.

Gerrard59:


You need to have a one-on-one discussion with your mom explaining the reasons you don't want children at the moment - entirely different from you don't want children at all. If she is someone who respects numbers, show her stats and pictures elucidating reasons why wanton and sometimes, early fecundity is not the right thing. Calmly tell her and your in-laws the benefits of postponed childbearing and a limited number of children (two maximum) will do for the trio (them, your wife and you and children).

See my thread for more details: https://www.nairaland.com/6035550/nigerians-poverty-certain-acts-perpetuate

My mum that has been spiritualy brain washed. She says family planning is from the devil,. Who says such? Even my father gave birth to me when he was 46yrs old.

Barbiturate:
Family planning is a method used to space kids and allow a desired number of kids through contraception.

Your wife can be pregnant and still be doing her masters.

Your mom and MIL can take care of her when she gives birth.

It won't also stop you from chasing your career.

Why did you get married then, if you both won't have time for each other?

I'm not attacking you bro, I'm just advising you. Both parents mean well for you guys.

It is our tradition that when you get married, the next is children. Children are blessings. Don't be afraid to have one.

They got married because they have their plans and how to go about it, so they can have time for themselves in the nearest future and not have to bother themselves with what they have the chance and means of doing earlier.

Birthing and nurturing will come easy with both parents available for the kids and themselves. Read his 4th and 5th paragraph to better understand his viewpoint.

Do not give in to the pressure by the family. You are the driver of your own family now. You already have your plans mapped out. See, these people don't care abiut your plans and future, all they care about is grandkids.

Don't succumb to the pressure! Never!

Barbiturate:
Family planning is a method used to space kids and allow a desired number of kids through contraception. What are you planning when you're not ready?

Your wife can be pregnant and still be doing her masters.

Your mom and MIL can take care of her when she gives birth.

It won't also stop you from chasing your career.

Why did you get married then, if you both won't have time for each other?

I'm not attacking you bro, I'm just advising you. Both parents mean well for you guys.

It is our tradition that when you get married, the next is children. Children are blessings. Don't be afraid to have one.

Bro am not even ready to have kids yet! People have kids when there are comfortable about it. I married my wife earlier cause she ticked all the boxes & i needed to get her off the market before someone else does. My mates are going about their businesses with no one bothering them about marraige & children. I just want to have my peace of mind.

[s]

Barbiturate:
Family planning is a method used to space kids and allow a desired number of kids through contraception. What are you planning when you're not ready?

Your wife can be pregnant and still be doing her masters.

Your mom and MIL can take care of her when she gives birth.

It won't also stop you from chasing your career.

Why did you get married then, if you both won't have time for each other?

I'm not attacking you bro, I'm just advising you. Both parents mean well for you guys.

It is our tradition that when you get married, the next is children. Children are blessings. Don't be afraid to have one.

[/s]


Stop these archaic way of life. Didn't you read where he said they both have planned not to have kids for now? In fact, all you wrote is trash. Did he tell you he's scared of having children?

Trash!

James4358:
My mum that has been spiritualy brain washed. She says family planning is from the devil,. Who says such? Even my father gave birth to me when he was 46yrs old.

So, how old was she when you were birthed?

James4358:
My mum that has been spiritualy brain washed. She says family planning is from the devil,. Who says such? Even my father gave birth to me when he was 46yrs old.

"My mum that has been spiritualy brain washed. She says family planning is from the devil."

Bro, it's gonna be difficult to convince your mom because once humans have been brainwashed spiritually, it's not easy to reason with them.

You need to stand your ground, regardless.

.

.

Gerrard59:

So, how old was she when you were birthed?

About 37 then.

Klass99:
More of his thoughts.....

Thanks for sharing bro!

[s]

tensazangetsu20:
Bants aside anyone who goes ahead to have a child in this shithole continent especially with the trajectory of how it's headed is a satanic demonic human being. Even the devilish politicians in Africa don't give birth to their kids here.

[/s]

Rants of a weakling!

NEWS FLASH!!! PEOPLE ARE HAVING CHILDREN IN. THIS “SHITHOLE CONTINENT” EVERY DAY AND THEY ARE DOING JUST FINE!

Make una dey here dey deceive and console una self! Laslas, una go log off go face real world!

Mariangeles:
[s][/s]

Rants of a weakling!

NEWS FLASH!!! PEOPLE ARE HAVING CHILDREN IN. THIS “SHITHOLE CONTINENT” EVERY DAY AND THEY ARE DOING JUST FINE!

Make una dey here dey deceive and console una self! Laslas, una go log off go face real world!

Of course they are having. Look at all the bandits, Boko Haram, Yahoo boys and kidnappers. It's just a tip of the iceberg of what's to come in future. Luckily those children will kill their parents before others at least. Mtscheew.

Your story too much I beg.

Now now your marriage don be 3yrs about na the ghost u marry

James4358:
My mum that has been spiritualy brain washed. She says family planning is from the devil,. Who says such? Even my father gave birth to me when he was 46yrs old.

Here....

cayorday89:
Open your mouth and tell them it is what you want and have decided to do, damn whatever they have to say or do, they will never understand you and your point.
Do this to give yourself rest of mind and most importantly your wife, because with time the attention and pressure will be on her.

tensazangetsu20:

Of course they are having. Look at all the bandits, Boko Haram, Yahoo boys and kidnappers. It's just a tip of the iceberg of what's to come in future. Luckily those children will kill their parents before others at least. Mtscheew.

Yeah! Those are kinds weaklings like you choose see to console yourselves for your weakness and inadequacies!

As a mother I will advice you. DO NOT have children due to family pressure. Children slow you down significantly. Find stability first to a certain degree, then children will follow. Your wife is still very young. Use it to your advantage and ignore the people who want to push you down the road of suffering. I have one child and I’m not having another one until maybe 5-6 years maybe longer as I know how life has turned around for me. Children are blessings but they are HUGE sacrifices. THINK WELL!!!!

James4358:
Am barely three years into marraige, the least reason i got married to my wife was for making babies.
My wife is going through a family planning method, but my mum and inlaws wont let us drink water.
It is grand children this & grand children that'. Even my own mum i always thought was learned & invoke with 21st century lifestyle has been in the fore front of disturbing our lives.
My wife is barely 26 and pursuing her master's programme to a conclusion & i've been busy traveling & attending various courses to gain speedy promotion & hit the peak of my para-millitary job. Where else would i get the time to start baby-sitting, which i know is a full time job.
Am not just the type to let a house maid take up the responsibility of training my children, this i know has negative effects & may some day backfire.
My mum have even gone ahead to tag this the handi_work of witchcraft. My elder brother has 3kids already, why the cry after my own.
This women wont just let us live our lives in peace!

Na wa oh..

But whenever I think of the fact that the parents of those fulani herdsmen, kidnappers, armed robbers were once compelled by their families and societies to bear kids,I just dey conclude say--"YES,na why we dey where we dey today as a people be this".

cayorday89:


They got married because they have their plans and how to go about it, so they can have time for themselves in the nearest future and not have to bother themselves with what they have the chance and means of doing earlier.

Birthing and nurturing will come easy with both parents available for the kids and themselves. Read his 4th and 5th paragraph to better understand his viewpoint.

4th and 5th paragraph?

Sonnobax15:

Na wa oh..

But whenever I think of the fact that the parents of those fulani herdsmen, kidnappers, armed robbers were once compelled by their families and societies to bear kids,I just dey conclude say--"YES,na why we dey where we dey today as a people be this".

You forget say the fulani herdsmen themselves, the kidnappers, armed robber etc., also have children of their own because family and society compels them all to bear kids?
Where naija dey today na small thing compared to what is to come..

Kobojunkie:
You forget say the fulani herdsmen themselves, the kidnappers, armed robber etc., also have children of their own because family and society compels them all to bear kids?
Where naija dey today na small thing compared to what is to come..

Meaning problem continues

Hahaha... It's expected. Don't let it bother u, they are expressing the desires of their heart.

Gerrard59:


To be fair, this will not stop people from procreating. The best advice is to birth children one can adequately take care of while preparing for the worst that will happen.

How do you feel being an hypocrite? Do you sleep well at night knowing fully well that you speak from two sides of your mouth?

My fren, goan make babies. You no want make grandma carry her grandkids? Selfish!