Happy new year NL peeps

I have come again

So Stargurls20's thread https://www.nairaland.com/7035387/there-really-point-gain-being inspired this. I wrote an article surrounding this topic last year upon inflection which I lost at the end of the year 2021.

This response would be have a religious flavor (so non-religious peeps can move on now).

So 'Do good girls carry last?'

It is a very popular saying that 'good girls carry last', 'bad girls get better husbands' yada yada yada that I would be looking at the 'good girlhood' across areas of concern. I would also be dispelling the myth that 'being good would get you good things' which is wahat our parents taught us.

I would be defining a good girl as a girl who doesn't drink alcohol, smoke, party, flirt/sleep about etc.

1. Marriage: This is the koko why girls are told to be 'good'. We also hear that men play with 'bad girls' and marry 'good girls' as a reward for the goodness. Interestingly, when people talk of men marrying good girls, they are referring to the benefits the good girls bring to the life of the men. The man are not marrying the good girl because he wants to 'reward' her for being good. The question the 'good girl' doesn't ask is if the man who wants her is worthy of her. I wrote a thread about that https://www.nairaland.com/5741247/does-he-want-does-he Anyone can want anything, the question is 'do they deserve what they want'?

Then you have the case of men claiming that 'they use bad girls and reserve the good girls for marriage'. I am pleased to announce that birds of the same feather flock together: if you deem a 'bad girl' worthy of sleeping with, you are the same with her.

1 Cor 6:16 And don’t you realize that if a man joins himself to a prostitute, he becomes one body with her? For the Scriptures say, “The two are united into one.”

Amos 3:3 Can two wlalk together except they be agreed?

So bad boy, carry on with your bad girls

Dear good girl, have you prepared yourself to be a good wife? have you learnt how to choose a good man? If no, your goodness will not get you a 'good husband' aka wealthy husband in the abroad. It is also amusing that the definition of a 'good' husband in this context is 'wealthy husband in the abroad' No good husband in Nigeria again?


2. Wealth: Nobody gets a job or promotion because they are good (except at their job). You get promoted because you have what it takes (skills, politics, emotional intelligence, clout, certification, lenght of employment etc) to move to the next level in line with your company's ethics. Bibilically, the passages that talk about wealth/promotion talk about diligence and blessing the work of your hands. Meaning that if a 'bad girl' does her job/business well, she would most likely do well.

The only direct reward for a 'good girl' (more specifically holiness) is heaven. We should be good (holy) girls because Mark 8: 36 says For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul? This means that you can make it on earth (without being good) however, you wouldn't make heaven which would be a tragedy.

We also have Karma waiting to pay people back for their deeds now or in future.

In summary my dearest good girl:
> if you want a good relationship/marriage: study the principles of marriage/choosing a spouse and follow it. Also back it up with prayers.
> if you want to make money/grow at work: study the principles of wealth/promotion and follow it.

See being a good girl as having good character which is a good base to build for whatever thing you want.

Two hymns capture this well:

Stanza three of Count your Blessings by Johnson Oatman
3 When you look at others with their lands and gold,
Think that Christ has promised you His wealth untold;
Count your many blessings, money cannot buy
Your reward in heaven, nor your home on high.
https://hymnary.org/text/when_upon_lifes_billows_you_are_tempest

Also Be glad in the Lord and Rejoice:
1 Be glad in the Lord and rejoice,
All ye that are upright in heart;
And ye that have made him your choice,
Bid sadness and sorrow depart.

2 What though in the conflict for right
Your enemies almost prevail,
God’s armies, just hid from your sight,
Are more than the foes which assail.
https://hymnary.org/text/be_glad_in_the_lord_and_rejoice_all_ye


A note to parents: Please let's stop our kids that a person who smokes, drinks etc. etc. would not do well in life. It is an archaic mentality which lures some of them into such life when they see their friends/mates engage in such and 'do well'.

I have colleagues who do these vices including sleeping around who are very good at what they do and get rewarded (financially) for it. Other aspects of their lives is not included because we rarely refer to people's spiritual, emotional, physical or mental health when we start these lectures.

Life also happens to everyone so when life hits a 'good person' after hearing all her/his life that 'be good so that bad things don't happen', they become discouraged and wonder why 'they were good all the while'.

Let us teach our kids to be 'good' because that is the right thing to do.

So you sabi bible like this. I thought you’re backslider like us. What a betrayed!

A Good girl is a Wife material
A bad girl is a PROSTITUTE.

They won't teach you that in college

I no read anything but i know sey good girls dey carry last big one oh nothink am....

Nope!

They'll always be at the forefront no matter what!

I'll be a bad bitch.

GOOD GIRLS ALWAYS FINISH LAST na the way the society take dey deceive vulnerable young girls. Make I tell you one thing eeh, 99% of boreholes you see would give anything to become a virgin once again. My dear virgins, don't ever compare yourselves with boreholes you see everywhere oooo because una better pass them in all ramification.
That aside sha, finishing first or last has to do with destiny and hard work. Some people are just destined to be rich while others not. No be because of say dem do ashawo or live rough like na make am. 98.5% of 9ja babes are boreholes, how many of them don marry rich men? It's just destiny, no be because of say dem waka about or because share toto for street. My dear virgins/decent babes, don't be discouraged at been good because it pays. God no go make una finish last, provided una add value to unaselves.


I don talk am before and I go talk am again, "the average 9ja babe(borehole) has a minimum of 10body counts and still counting rapidly"

AfroKnight:
So you sabi bible like this. I thought you’re backslider like us. What a betrayed!

E bi like say you dey mistake me for someone else

siofra:


I'll be a bad bitch.

I'll be me too...

I smoke... Drink... Flirt (if I'm single)... Love going out...

I'm not bad... I've been indoors my entire life... God knows I deserve to have a little fun...

I'll marry someone who has a good heart but is a psycho too...

siofra:


I'll be a bad bitch.

Interesting.

Why?

Datboredberry:
I'll be me too...

I smoke... Drink... Flirt (if I'm single)... Love going out...

I'm not bad... I've been indoors my entire life... God knows I deserve to have a little fun...

I'll marry someone who has a good heart but is a psycho too...

Indoors & fun are not mutually exclusive.

Indoors also doesn't mean good: it means you are an introvert while outdoors doesn't mean bad.

A serial killer or a fraudster can be introverted.

A good hearted psycho is still a psycho.

bibianna:
Nope!

They'll always be at the forefront no matter what!

Forefront of what?

odinson1:
A Good girl is a Wife material
A bad girl is a PROSTITUTE.

They won't teach you that in college

A good girl who has developed herself in the place of marriage is a good wife material to a good man.

bukatyne:


Indoors & fun are not mutually exclusive.

Indoors also doesn't mean good: it means you are an introvert while outdoors doesn't mean bad.

A serial killer or a fraudster can be introverted.

A good hearted psycho is still a psycho.

I'm not introverted... I'm an extrovert... Who's been kept indoors by her family...

Values... You know

If you go out to parties or smoke... Then you're wayward... Etc...

Datboredberry:
I'm not introverted... I'm an extrovert... Who's been kept indoors by her family...

Values... You know

If you go out to parties or smoke... Then you're wayward... Etc...

How do you know you are extroverted if you have been indoors?

What do you think you are missing outside/ what are your parents stopping you from doing?

Hm...

If you marry a bad girl, you are finished. If you marry a bad man, you are finished.

Being good is not enough. Make sure you activate wisdom when choosing the person you will marry.

Nice thread, ma'am.
People actually think that been a good girl is about been introverted or quiet or even reserved.
They think those who smoke or party or extroverted should be termed "bad girls", lol..

What is even funnier is that they think the reward for being a GOOD girl is good husband. Interestingly, their definition of good husbands is a "wealthy man who spends". The place they think good husbands abound is in clubs, not pulpit.

The truth is, all of the attributes I mentioned are mere attributes that in no way determine a person's goodness or badness.

Been good or bad is seen in how you treat people(including yourself) and react to situations.

jmoore:
If you marry a bad girl, you are finished. If you marry a bad man, you are finished.

Being good is not enough. Make sure you activate wisdom when choosing the person you will marry.

On point

Stargurl20:
Hm...

Does this answer your good girl inquiry?

ChemicalReaction:

1. Nice thread, ma'am.

2. People actually think that been a good girl is about been introverted or quiet or even reserved.
They think those who smoke or party or extroverted should be termed "bad girls", lol..

3. What is even funnier is that they think the reward for being a GOOD girl is good husband. Interestingly, their definition of good husbands is a "wealthy man who spends". The place they think good husbands abound is in clubs, not pulpit.

4. The truth is, all of the attributes I mentioned are mere attributes that in no way determine a person's goodness or badness.

5. Been good or bad is seen in how you treat people(including yourself) and react to situations.

1. Thanks.

2. I actually believe there are good girls and bad girls based on their attributes which includes physical/social. However, I have realized that a good girl morally can be a terrible employee/boss/wife/mother/daughter/neighbour; a bad girl morally can be a fanatastic boss/friend/employee/wife/mother/daughter etc. etc. The problem is when we don't realize that every facet of life requires certain input and think being 'good (actually holy) is enough to get you anything apart from the right standing with God and/or good energy from the universe if we are looking at Karma.

3. Ironic considering a 'good girl' would not even be in the club in the first place. Maybe their definition of a good husband already tells us that a good girl doesn't 'deserve him'

4 & 5: treated in point 2.

jmoore:
If you marry a bad girl, you are finished. If you marry a bad man, you are finished.

Being good is not enough. Make sure you activate wisdom when choosing the person you will marry.

Sound wisdom.

bukatyne:


1. Thanks.

2. I actually believe there are good girls and bad girls based on their attributes which includes physical/social. However, I have realized that a good girl morally can be a terrible employee/boss/wife/mother/daughter/neighbour; a bad girl morally can be a fanatastic boss/friend/employee/wife/mother/daughter etc. etc. The problem is when we don't realize that every facet of life requires certain input and think being 'good (actually holy) is enough to get you anything apart from the right standing with God and/or good energy from the universe if we are looking at Karma.

3. Ironic considering a 'good girl' would not even be in the club in the first place. Maybe their definition of a good husband already tells us that a good girl doesn't 'deserve him'

4 & 5: treated in point 2.

What's the basis for determining a good girl

siofra:


I'll be a bad bitch.

not sleeping around doesn't make you a good girl,you need to improve your character on a moral and social standing hope you get

If you become a biitxh men will gladly treat you like one