Shadows Of Redemption - Literature - Nairaland
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Above The Shadows / Tiwatope's Redemption (A Romance Novelette By Kayode Odusanya) / Shadows Of Death (the Girl-god) (2) (3) (4)
| Shadows Of Redemption by Magnetic010: 5:33pm On Jun 07, 2023 |
I recently went with a friend to do some cleaning in a apartment he intends using for a warehous. While cleaning one of the rooms I found some personal items belonging to the previous occupants of the apartment. Somehow that got me thinking about so many different things and I ended up imagining a big story(I think). Since I’ve read so many beautiful stories here I decided to share the story here with you guys as it progress….I how you enjoy it. Please don’t be too harsh with your comments I’m. It a writer also I’m using AI for some most of the description and to help me write faster INTRO So the story It’s about a young man who just got rusticated from university in his final year because he was wrongly accused of cheating in an exam, out of fear of disappointing his parents he runs to a nearby city and gets a job to clean an empty warehouse, while cleaning he stumble into an ID belonging to a dead young student- his discovery opens up series of events as the death which was earlier ruled as suicide seems to have been anything but and certain influential persons are willing to do anything to keep the truth from coming out |
| Re: Shadows Of Redemption by Magnetic010: 5:39pm On Jun 07, 2023 |
>>>>>>>>>>>>>CHAPTER ONE<<<<>>>>><<<<<<<< John Okobi had always been an intelligent and diligent young man, with dreams of making his mark on the world. At 21 years old, he was in the final year of his studies at University of Benin(Uniben). Tall and lean, with a mop of disheveled jet black hair and expressive brown eyes, John had become known among his peers for his exceptional academic performance and unwavering commitment to his studies. Growing up in a modest household, John's parents had sacrificed a lot to support his education. They instilled in him the values of hard work, honesty, and the pursuit of knowledge. These values formed the core of John's personality. He was not a kid he knew everything his parents had sacrificed so he could get to where he was today, so while other kids his age went out clubbing or dating he didn’t have that luxury. He had to focus on his studies graduate with a good degree and hopefully with a little bit of luck and plenty of grace he would get a good job and then he can help his parents out of the single room apartment they had been living in mafoluku oshodi for the past 11 years. But he wasn’t living in fools paradise there are no jobs in Nigeria even the ones available you have to have good connections to be able to get any good jobs- these are stories everyone on campus has heard but he wasn’t letting those things deter him maybe he was a nobody and his biggest connection was his uncle who works as a driver in a night club- uncle Theo swore he had been to the house of every big socialite in Lagos, he told stories of how “small small” boys spent millions of Naira on drinks every club night Most of those stories seemed unreal to john, how could one bottle of wine or was it champagne uncle Theo called it cost over 500k? Mom always told him to take Uncle Theo’s stories with a pinch of salt- “Theophilus” is my younger brother and right from when we were little he always had a tendency to exaggerate things” she said to him after one of his short but story filled visits. So no connections from either side of the family for John his only hope was to graduate and graduate well. However, John's life took an unexpected turn when he was falsely accused of cheating during his final exams. The night before one of the most challenging courses that year, John had been burning the midnight oil, pouring over his textbooks and lecture notes. Exhaustion finally caught up with him, and he unknowingly drifted off to sleep at his desk. In the early morning hours, he abruptly woke up, realizing with a jolt that the exam was about to start in mere minutes. In a panic, John hastily cleared his desk, shoving books and papers aside. In his rush, his jotter, a small notebook where he had scribbled important formulas and reminders, slipped from his trembling hands and fell to the floor, unnoticed by him. During the exam, as John focused intently on answering the questions to the best of his ability, the examiner made his way through the rows of students. Spotting the jotter on the floor, he swiftly picked it up, glancing at its contents. Unaware of John's unintentional mistake, the examiner concluded that John had resorted to cheating, using the jotter as an unfair advantage. The examiner, with a stern expression,confronted John with the jotter in hand, accusing him of cheating. Shocked and bewildered, John vehemently denied the accusations, explaining the circumstances that led to the jotter falling to the floor. However, despite his protests, the examiner remained convinced of John's guilt. The accusation spread quickly throughout the university, tarnishing John's previously spotless reputation. The academic authorities, pressured by the seriousness of the allegations, decided to rusticate him pending further investigation, leaving John in a state of disbelief and despair. 3 Likes |
| Re: Shadows Of Redemption by Magnetic010: 6:02pm On Jun 07, 2023 |
Kindly show support and words of encouragement if your are reading this thanks 1 Like |
| Re: Shadows Of Redemption by Magnetic010: 6:07pm On Jun 07, 2023 |
John had embark upon self imposed 7days fasting and prayer in the days leading to the final hearing of his case with the disciplinary committee. He had developed a routine; he left the hostel very early in the morning went to all Saints Christian assembly, he like the church because it was far from the busy hostel and lecture thwarted and almost anyone you met there had something urgent they wanted from God. If anyone could help plead his cause it had to be God- only Him was his witness the evidence against him was damning but heaven knows he had no intention to cheat. So every morning he went to the church and prayed well begged for God to intervene. He didn’t know what he would do if things went against him, what would he tell his parents, the news would kill him mom- he was their only hope. He told God all these things and he had hoped that somehow even if he wasn’t the best of Christian God would see his heart and safe him and his parent from the shame and reproach impending. But as John sat on one of those long chair that Friday afternoon the image that of dejected and lost soul- he had just been informed of the verdict from the disciplinary committee; he had been rusticated from the university on the grounds of cheating and exam malpractice. This one place he had always come for prayers and felt a glimmer of hope had become his place of mourning. This time he just sat down lost in deep thoughts. The weight of the false accusation hung heavily on his shoulders, and he couldn't help but reflect on how his life had taken such a drastic turn. His mind swirled with a whirlwind of emotions, ranging from anger and frustration to profound sadness. He couldn't comprehend how everything he had worked so hard for was suddenly crumbling before his eyes. Images of his parents' faces flooded his thoughts, their unwavering support and pride replaced by disappointment and sadness. The mere thought of the shame and humiliation his rustication would bring upon his family brought tears to his eyes. John's once close-knit group of friends and coursemates seemed to have turned against him as well. Their whispered conversations and the glances thrown his way as he walked through the university corridors spoke volumes. The very people he thought he could rely on, those who had shared countless study sessions and laughed together during breaks, now seemed to have unanimously agreed on his guilt. It was a bitter pill to swallow, knowing that his reputation had been tarnished in the eyes of those he once considered allies. In the depths of his contemplation, John couldn't help but wonder why anyone would think he would resort to cheating. Throughout his academic journey, he had never been caught in any scandalous activity, let alone attempted to cheat. The accusation went against everything he believed in and worked hard for—integrity, honesty, and the pursuit of knowledge. As the minutes turned into hours, John's introspection grew deeper. He replayed the events leading up to the false accusation, trying to find any hint or reason behind it. But the more he dwelled on it, the more he realized that sometimes, circumstances could conspire against even the most virtuous individuals. Heartbroken and fearing the disappointment he would bring upon his parents, John made the impulsive decision to run away. He couldn't bear the thought of facing his parents with such a stain on his record, and the weight of the false accusation was too heavy for him to bear. Eager to move forward and find a fresh start, John logged onto a job search website on his phone. Scrolling through the listings, he came across an intriguing advertisement seeking a warehouse storekeeper for an new warehouse in Warri delta state. It seemed like the perfect opportunity for him to earn a living while seeking solace from his current predicament. He didn’t think he could bare another minute on campus and he had no relatives in benin city so maybe a different city could help him heal and think of the next step to take. Plus the job offer accommodation. Without hesitation, John quickly applied for the position, his expressing his enthusiasm and willingness to take on the responsibilities of the role. To his surprise, he received a call from the warehouse owner, Mr. Thompson, just hours after submitting his application. With a mix of nervousness and anticipation, John arranged a meeting with Mr. Thompson at a small café in town. The journey was filled with a mix of trepidation and hope, as he wondered what this new opportunity could bring. 2 Likes |
| Re: Shadows Of Redemption by Magnetic010: 6:12pm On Jun 07, 2023 |
Let me know what your thoughts are thanks |
| Re: Shadows Of Redemption by Magnetic010: 6:14pm On Jun 07, 2023 |
Eager to embark on his new chapter, John arrived at the agreed meeting place, a small café in town, to meet with Mr. Thompson, the owner of the warehouse. John entered the small office where Mr. Thompson was busy sorting through paperwork. He cleared his throat to get Mr. Thompson's attention, who looked up and greeted him with a warm smile. As they sat down at a corner table, Mr. Thompson began to explain the details of the job. "John, I must apologize for the confusion," Mr. Thompson started. "You see, the warehouse is actually an old house that I've been renovating. I had arranged for cleaners to clear out the two-bedroom apartment earlier today, but they failed to show up. That’s why I asked that we meet here instead. “Okay? But sir what exactly are you storing in the ware house you didn’t really indicate on the app” “Oh that’s true my Thompson said. Well you see John I’m an interior designer I have been doing this work gesturing at what John can clearing seen on his table as building design plans for over 17 years. I’ve worked in several cities and in different countries. “Wow that very impressive sir” John knew how much people enjoyed flattering and he could tell from the smile the swept across Mr Thompson face he was no different. So the items we'll be storing in the warehouse are imported items used for interior design of homes and offices.- foreign! “If it’s imported doesn’t that already make it foreign- John wondered to himself but John understand street lingua the emphasis on the foreign is so John will understand that the items are coming form overseas” -he remembered getting into an argument back in secondary school with his then class mate Tobi who had insisted that his uncle was living overseas no abroad. Yeah that happened; as far as Tobi was concerned if you travelled to countries like India, Turkey or Cyprus you were abroad but when you go to countries like Germany, The UK and USA that person was overseas. And to John’s astonishment most of their classmate actually agreed with Tobi back then. So him hearing Mr. Thompson emphasize on the foreign didn’t seem all that odd to him now. It’s Nigeria and we are just how we are….so he nod his head and Me Thompson continued his explanation These items include unique furniture pieces, decorative accents, artwork, and even rare fabrics and textiles. They are sourced from various countries and cater to clients who have a taste for exclusivity and sophistication in their interior designs." "It sounds like we'll be dealing with high-quality and luxurious products. I can imagine the creativity and attention to detail that goes into each piece." Mr. Thompson nodded, a proud gleam in his eyes. "You're absolutely right, John. Each item has been carefully selected to meet the discerning tastes of our clientele. As the warehouse storekeeper, you'll play a crucial role in ensuring the safe storage, organization, and retrieval of these valuable pieces. Attention to detail and meticulousness will be key." John leaned in, absorbing every word. "I'm ready for the challenge, Mr. Thompson. I understand the importance of maintaining the integrity and condition of these imported items. I will make sure they are properly stored and accounted for." Mr. Thompson smiled, appreciating John's enthusiasm. "I have no doubt about that, John. You've already shown great dedication and commitment in your work. I trust that you will handle this new responsibility with the same level of professionalism and care." After a few more questions and a little bit of chitchat Mr Thompson and John had reached an agreement and thus John was employed, John had agreed to a salary of 30k a month because Mr Thompson had promised him a room in the apartment/warehouse, a mattress and some other basic things to help him get settle- it seems like a fair offer so he accepted. Mr. Thompson offered to drop John off at the warehouse before heading out to purchase a mattress and other household items to make John more comfortable in the apartment. They made their way to Mr. Thompson's car, and soon they arrived at the warehouse. The warehouse was on the first floor of a two story old house. Located along Effurun/Sapele Road. They were six two bedrooms flats in total in the building but only two were occupied by people the rest had been converted to office space or warehouse just like the one john would be working in. John looked around the empty warehouse, it was evident the cleaners had failed to show up as scheduled. He felt a sense of responsibility and a desire to make a good impression on Mr. Thompson, the owner of the warehouse. With determination in his eyes, he approached Mr. Thompson. "Mr. Thompson, I understand the importance of maintaining a clean and organized workspace. If you don't mind, I'd be more than willing to clean the warehouse myself.” Mr. Thompson regarded John with appreciation. "John, I must say, you continue to impress me with your initiative and willingness to take on additional responsibilities. If you're up for it, I'd be grateful for your help in cleaning the warehouse. I'll compensate you accordingly." A sense of relief washed over John as he nodded. Before he boarded to bus to Warri he had just 5k in the account and judging from the last alert he received from the bank he was left with 1600 Naira he had just gotten this job he didn’t think he could ask for IOU any time some and with the amount of guilt he is currently feeling he could ask his dad for monthly allowance again like ever he had to look for a way to stop them from sending him money again. "Absolutely, Mr. Thompson. I want to ensure that everything is in order for our operations. You can count on me to make this space clean and presentable." With a grateful smile, Mr. Thompson handed John a set of keys and provided him with additional instructions. "There's cleaning equipment in the storage room on the ground floor. Take your time, and don't hesitate to let me know if you need anything. I'll be heading out to get some basic household things for you to get comfortable." As Mr. Thompson left to gather the essentials, John felt a surge of excitement mingled with a touch of nervousness. He made his way to the old house, unlocking the door to the apartment. Stepping inside, he surveyed the space. The apartment had a certain charm with its vintage wallpaper, worn wooden floors, and large windows that allowed in streams of natural light. As John went about his duties cleaning apartment-turned-warehouse, he couldn't help but notice the lingering traces of another life that once resided within these walls. The sense of a hasty departure hung in the air, leaving an eerie feeling as he navigated through the empty rooms. While cleaning the second bedroom, his gaze fell upon a small pile of papers left forgotten on a dusty shelf. Curiosity sparked within him, and he picked up the stack, sifting through the forgotten remnants of someone else's life. Among the scattered notes and old receipts, a small object caught his eye—a weathered, plastic school ID card. 2 Likes |
| Re: Shadows Of Redemption by Magnetic010: 6:16pm On Jun 07, 2023 |
Almost done with chapter one….I think this is developing into an interesting story…. 1 Like |
| Re: Shadows Of Redemption by Magnetic010: 6:25pm On Jun 07, 2023 |
As John held the card in his hands, he observed the faded photograph of a young girl smiling back at him. Her innocent eyes seemed to tell a story of their own, one filled with dreams and laughter. The name on the card read Annabella O. Edafe and it indicated she was a student of a Christian school somewhere in the city. A mixture of empathy and intrigue enveloped John as he contemplated the story behind this abandoned ID card. What had happened to Onome and her family? Why had they left in such a hurry, leaving behind traces of their existence? He put the ID card in his back pack and went to to his cleaning he had resolved to had the ID card to mr Thompson once he returned with the mattress and other items. Hours passed as John tirelessly scrubbed and polished every nook and cranny. With each completed task, he felt a sense of accomplishment and progress. By the time Mr. Thompson returned with basic household items, John had transformed the apartment into a clean and welcoming space. Mr. Thompson marveled at the sight before him. "John, you've done a remarkable job! I couldn't be happier with the results. You've truly made this place shine." Mr. Thompson was a man true to his words he bought everything he promised John to help him settle, mattress camp gas, set of pots plates , bed sheet and even curtains for the windows. John was very impressed he wondered if he could still make for payment for the cleaning job he had done judging belt how much mr Thompson must have spent to get all these items. “John I’m sure you can fix the curtains right? John nodded, Good, so just fix the mattress and everything, if you want to get something to eat you can take keke to jakpa junction or even walk down to water resources junction it’s just a few minutes walk okay. “Take your time settling in and make this place your own. Remember, if you need anything or have any questions, don't hesitate to reach out. He handed John 10k- 5k for cleaning and another 5k as gift for being so impressive on the first day on the job”. "Thank you, Mr. Thompson. It means a lot to me. I really appreciate your kindness ." Mr. Thompson's smile widened. "Now, let's talk about your role here. The big parlor, will serve as the warehouse space. That's where we'll store various items. The goods will arrived tomorrow afternoon so you have to take proper inventory- I’ll come with some books by morning okay?” As for the rooms, you can choose any available one to sleep and rest. I've hired a few other workers, and they'll be using the remaining room. I hope this arrangement suits you." John felt a sense of relief and gratitude wash over him. "Absolutely, Mr. Thompson. This arrangement is more than generous. I appreciate your consideration." Mr. Thompson patted John's shoulder reassuringly. "Good to hear. Remember, the warehouse is your primary responsibility, but feel free to make yourself comfortable in the apartment. It's important for you to have a place to rest and rejuvenate after your shifts." With a newfound sense of belonging, John thanked Mr. Thompson once again for the opportunity. As they both stood in the freshly cleaned apartment, they discussed a few final details about work schedules and the tasks that awaited John in the coming days. Feeling a sense of purpose and a glimmer of hope, John watched as Mr. Thompson left, leaving him alone in the apartment-turned-warehouse. The magnitude of this chance to rebuild his life and clear his name settled upon him, invigorating his spirit. Taking a moment to absorb his surroundings, John entered the big parlor, envisioning its transformation into a functional warehouse space. It was a spacious room with high ceilings and large windows that would allow for natural light to illuminate the storage area. After a long day of cleaning the warehouse and getting settled into his new living space, John's exhaustion began to catch up with him. He decided to grab a quick dinner and sat down at the small table in the apartment. The warm meal filled his stomach, providing a sense of comfort and nourishment. As the night wore on, the weariness seeped into John's bones, and his eyelids grew heavy. He settled down on the makeshift bed in his room, the events of the day swirling in his mind. Slowly, he drifted off into a deep slumber. In the realm of dreams, John found himself standing in a place he couldn't quite recognize. It was a desolate landscape, filled with shadows and an eerie silence. The air felt heavy with sorrow and unease. Suddenly, a faint sound reached John's ears—a soft whimpering, like that of a child in distress. He followed the sound, his heart pounding with a mix of fear and concern. As he turned a corner, he saw a young girl, dressed in a neat school uniform, tears streaming down her face. It was the same girl from the school ID card he had found earlier. Annabella. John approached her cautiously, his voice filled with compassion. "Annabella , what's wrong? Why are you crying? How can I help you?" Annabella looked up at John, her eyes filled with fear and desperation. She reached out, clutching his hand tightly. "Please, you have to help me. Nobody believed me. But I didn’t do it." John woke up with a start, his heart pounding in his chest. The vividness of the dream lingered, leaving him in a state of both bewilderment and determination. He knew that the dream held a deeper significance, a connection between his own struggles and the plight of Annabella… Little did he know that his path would intertwine with hers in unexpected ways, setting in motion a chain of events that would test his resilience, compassion, and the depths of his own strength. 2 Likes |
| Re: Shadows Of Redemption by Magnetic010: 6:27pm On Jun 07, 2023 |
Well this is the end of chapter one….let me know what you think of the story so far |
| Re: Shadows Of Redemption by Magnetic010: 10:36am On Jun 10, 2023 |
So I’m dropping chapter two starting today |
| Re: Shadows Of Redemption by Nobody: 11:03am On Jun 10, 2023 |
Nice write up... But for a story that's inspired by true life events, I think chapter one sounds more like a fiction rather than a story inspired by true life events, why? 1. I don't know about Nigeria, but usually during the morning of the exams, we're arranged alphabetically in accordance to our surnames and we don't always write in the same venue, so how did John know that he was going to write his exam on the same desk that he spent the night studying on? 2. During the exams, students are required to either take their belongings to the front, or outside of the class, so are you telling me that John didn't see his jotter on the floor as he returned from taking his study materials to the front or outside? 3. Again, as they were preparing for the exam, didn't the students sitting next to him spot the jotter on the floor and told him about it? I mean come on, anyone could've seen it. 4. Usually before the students could begin writing their exam, they're given some time to go through the question paper at first before they could be given answer sheets to start writing, are you telling me that the invigilator didn't see the jotter on the floor as he or she was distributing the question papers to the students and had it removed from the floor? 5. Even after the jotter was spotted on the floor, how come the invigilator didn't ask for any witnesses to confirm whether John was cheating or not? 6. And usually before the exams could begin, the invigilators will go through all the rows of the students just to ensure that all is well before they could tell the students to start writing, so are you telling me that not a single invigilator spotted the jotter before giving the students the permission to start writing? Your story is not bad, but chapter one has left me with more questions than answers for me... The storyline sounds more made up rather than something based on true life story. Magnetic010: |
| Re: Shadows Of Redemption by Magnetic010: 2:19pm On Jun 10, 2023 |
Samantha124:Thanks for your input on the story: the true life event was the ID card found at the empty warehouse while cleaning the rest I am making up as I think dear…bear with me |
| Re: Shadows Of Redemption by Nobody: 4:59pm On Jun 10, 2023 |
Okay...  Magnetic010: |
| Re: Shadows Of Redemption by Magnetic010: 5:23pm On Jun 10, 2023 |
>>>>>>>Chapter 2<<<<>>>>>>>>>>>> As the remnants of the dream slowly faded away, John found himself back in the reality of the dimly lit room. He sat on the edge of the bed, deep in thought, his mind still grappling with the significance of his encounter with Annabel A surge of realization coursed through him as he remembered the ID card he had found earlier. In the flurry of events, he hadn't had a chance to give it to Mr. Thompson, the owner of the warehouse. John reached into his back pack and pulled out the crumpled card, examining it closely. He stared at Annabel's innocent face captured in the photograph, the weight of her plea lingering in his mind. A mix of curiosity, concern, and a growing sense of responsibility tugged at him. He wondered if the dream was merely a product of his subconscious or if it held a deeper message he should heed. Should he bring up the dream to Mr. Thompson? Should he mention Annabel and her desperate cries for help? John found himself torn between dismissing it as a mere coincidence or acknowledging the possibility that the dream held a hidden truth. As he contemplated his next course of action, exhaustion washed over him once again. The weariness from the day's events and the emotional weight of the dream threatened to pull him back into slumber. With a heavy sigh, John decided to set aside his thoughts for the moment and allow sleep to claim him. |
| Re: Shadows Of Redemption by Magnetic010: 5:23pm On Jun 10, 2023 |
This is the start of chapter two |
| Re: Shadows Of Redemption by Magnetic010: 5:25pm On Jun 10, 2023 |
CHAPTER TWO CONTINUES Morning arrived with a gentle glow seeping through the cracks in the curtains. John stretched and yawned, his mind shifting from the mysterious dream to the tasks that lay ahead. He resolved to focus on his responsibilities at the warehouse, ensuring that everything was in order for the arrival of the imported items. As he made his way to the main area of the warehouse, he found Mr. Thompson already there, overseeing the preparations for the day. A sense of anticipation filled the air, the promise of a new beginning tingling with each passing moment. For a moment he thought of giving the ID card to Mr Thompson and sharing the dream he had about the girl with him but he decided against it. What if Mr Thompson didn’t believe him what if he thinks he is just using it as an excuse to run from work after just one day. Plus he didn’t want to risk Mr. Thompson thinking him crazy. So he told himself “John do what any normal person would do toss the ID card in the waste bin and try not to ruin this one too”. So John shelved every thought of Annabel and the ID card and kept his attention solely on work it was the first full day of work and he wanted to impress his new boss. Soon the much-anticipated shipment of imported items finally arrived at the warehouse. The delivery truck pulled up to the loading dock, and a team of workers began unloading the carefully packaged boxes and crates, revealing an array of exquisite interior design pieces. Filled with a sense of responsibility, John took charge of the inventory process. He meticulously examined each item, checking for any damages or discrepancies. With a notepad in hand, he recorded the details of each piece, carefully noting its description, quantity, and condition. His keen eye for detail and systematic approach ensured that nothing escaped his scrutiny. As the day progressed, John's dedication and commitment to his work impressed Mr. Thompson. Recognizing his efforts, the owner decided to take John out for a late lunch to show his appreciation and to discuss some important matters. Over a meal at a nearby cafe, Mr. Thompson informed John about a recent development. The lady who was originally scheduled to join the team and assist with the warehouse operations had experienced a personal tragedy. She had lost her father and would be unable to resume work until the following week. Understanding the difficult circumstances, John empathized with the lady and expressed his condolences. He assured Mr. Thompson that he would do his best to handle the warehouse responsibilities in her absence. Mr. Thompson appreciated John's understanding and dedication, expressing his confidence in John's abilities. The lunch conversation shifted to their plans for the upcoming week. They discussed the tasks ahead, the need for additional help once the lady returned, and their shared goal of ensuring the smooth operation of the warehouse. Mr. Thompson emphasized the importance of teamwork and open communication, reinforcing the idea that they were all in this together. With their lunchtime conversation coming to an end, John felt a renewed sense of purpose. He understood the trust that Mr. Thompson had placed in him, and he was determined to exceed expectations in his role as the caretaker of the warehouse. 1 Like |
| Re: Shadows Of Redemption by Magnetic010: 6:01pm On Jun 10, 2023 |
Returning to the warehouse after lunch, John resumed his responsibilities with a renewed vigor. He continued organizing the imported items, arranging them neatly on shelves and in designated areas. The warehouse began to take shape, transforming into a space that exuded both elegance and functionality. After a productive day at the warehouse, John decided to take a leisurely walk around the surrounding area. The sun was beginning to set, casting a warm, golden glow over the streets. As he strolled along, taking in the sights and sounds of the city, he couldn't help but feel a sense of tranquility settling within him. Lost in his thoughts, John's attention was suddenly captured by a figure highlighting from a tricycle(yea they were everywhere in Warri-from the expressways to the streets the entire city was filled with keke. It so different from Benin it was one of the first things he had noticed about Warri. They were probably as much keke as humans in Warri okay that’s a bit of a stretch but it’s was much so so much). It was a young woman, her features radiant and her style captivating. What caught John's eye, however, was the delicate nose ring she wore. It rested perfectly between her nostrils, adding an intriguing touch to her overall beauty. For some inexplicable reason, John found himself drawn to the charm of the nose ring. It was as if a newfound appreciation for this particular accessory had awakened within him. He couldn't help but be captivated by the way it accentuated the woman's features. He noticed himself walking towards her; wait why was he doing that it’s very unlike him to walk up to a lady to start a conversation he’d only ever focus on his study and never had time for any distractions but then he realized he had no studies to focus on at the moment. This was new territory and a new John and new John does things like talk to pretty damsels. Summoning all his courage, John approached her, his heart pounding in his chest. With each step, he rehearsed what he wanted to say, trying to appear confident. However, as he finally stood before her, all his well-rehearsed words evaporated from his mind, leaving him tongue-tied and stumbling over his words. "Um... Hi," John managed to stammer out, his voice betraying his nervousness. "I, uh, noticed your nose ring, and it's... really nice. I mean, it suits you." The young lady smiled politely, seemingly amused by John's sudden awkwardness. "Thank you," she replied, her voice gentle and soothing. "I've always liked how nose rings can add a unique touch to someone's appearance." Feeling a mixture of relief and embarrassment, John tried to recover from his initial fumble. "Yeah, it definitely does. It's funny, actually. I never really paid attention to nose rings before, but seeing yours... it kind of made me appreciate them." The girl’s smile widened, and she tilted her head slightly. "Well, I'm glad to have sparked that appreciation in you. It's always interesting how certain things can unexpectedly catch our attention." As they continued their conversation, John's nervousness gradually faded away. He found himself enjoying the company of this intriguing young lady, their conversation flowing naturally. They spoke about various topics, sharing stories, and even discovering common interests. As the evening sky deepened into shades of violet and stars began to twinkle above, John and the lady bid each other farewell. He had walked her the front of her house gate. She informed him that she lived with an over protecter elder brother so a quick hand shake and exchange of WhatsApp contact and John turn and walked back in the direction they came. Although he hadn't managed to make a profound impression, John felt a sense of gratitude for the encounter. He realized that sometimes, unexpected moments and connections could hold their own beauty and significance. With a smile on his face, John returned to the warehouse, his mind buzzing with newfound appreciation for the small intricacies of life. He couldn't help but wonder what other surprises and discoveries awaited him in this new chapter of his journey, both within the warehouse and beyond. After returning to the warehouse, John's thoughts were still filled with the encounter with the pretty damsel he had met earlier. As he settled down for dinner, he decided to indulge in a hearty meal of rice stew and succulent pork meat. The aroma filled the small space, comforting his senses. Savoring each bite, John reflected on the flavors of the dish. Pork meat was a common delicacy in the city, and he had always enjoyed its rich taste. But tonight, as he savored the tender meat, he couldn't help but think back to Jane and the way their conversation had sparked something within him. He couldn't help but feel a desire to reconnect with the woman he had met earlier. Pulling out his phone, he opened the WhatsApp application and searched for her contact. After finding her name, he hesitated for a moment, his fingers hovering over the keyboard. He contemplated what he should say, not wanting to appear too eager or awkward. Finally, he decided to keep it simple and genuine. John typed a message: "Hey, it's John from earlier. I hope you're doing well. I just wanted to say that it was really nice talking to you today. Your presence brightened my day. Take care!" With a sense of anticipation, John pressed the send button, his heart racing as he waited for a response. Moments later, a notification appeared, indicating a new message from her. He couldn't help but feel a surge of excitement as he opened the chat. Her reply appeared on the screen: "Hi John! It's great to hear from you. I had a wonderful time talking with you too. Your appreciation for nose rings made me smile. Let's stay in touch. Have a restful night!" “Beautiful, smart and witty” maybe I have found my soul mate could this be the reason why I am here in Warri- John smile as he allowed those sweet but incredibly silly thoughts fill his head for the moment. In this moment he felt like life might not be all so bad in this moment he felt life could still be good for him. But then his mind drifted to Annabel once again. The dreams of her plea for help lingered in his subconscious, and as he finished his meal, exhaustion washed over him. He found himself drifting into a deep slumber, unsure of what awaited him in the realm of dreams. In his dream, John found himself in an unfamiliar surroundings in what seem like a school class room, John noticed he had stepped into a well-lit space filled with desks and chairs arranged in neat rows. The walls painted in a soothing color, providing a conducive atmosphere for learning. There she was at the far end of the classroom; Annabel, her eyes filled with a mixture of sadness and hope. As John looked at her, a sense of familiarity washed over him. He could swear that he had seen her before, not just in his dreams but also in the waking world. The connection between them felt inexplicably strong, as if their paths were somehow intertwined. Annabel extended her hand towards John, her voice barely a whisper. "Please, help me," she implored, her voice carrying an urgency that tugged at his heart. "There's something here, something important…Nobody believed me but I didn’t do it" Startled, John reached out to take her hand, but just as his fingertips brushed against hers, he woke up abruptly. His eyes snapped open, and for a fleeting moment, he could have sworn he saw Annabel's figure fade away in the dimly lit room. Shaken by the vividness of the dream, John sat up in bed, his heart racing. Was it just a dream, or was there something more to it? He glanced around the room, half-expecting to see Annabel's presence lingering in the shadows. Taking a deep breath, John tried to steady his racing thoughts. The dreams of Annabel seemed to be growing more intense, and he couldn't shake the feeling that they held a deeper significance. 1 Like |
| Re: Shadows Of Redemption by Magnetic010: 6:02pm On Jun 10, 2023 |
End of chapter two let me know what you guys thinks please |
| Re: Shadows Of Redemption by Nobody: 7:24pm On Jun 10, 2023 |
But why don't you write your own book and earn from it instead of posting it here on nairaland? There are some sites that also pay authors for writing short stories. Anyone can steal this masterpiece of yours on this forum and claim it as his or hers and make a living out of it... Have you thought about that? Magnetic010: |
| Re: Shadows Of Redemption by Magnetic010: 8:54pm On Jun 10, 2023 |
Samantha124:Well this is my first time writing a novel I’m not sure how people will respond to it. Do you really think it’s good I mean so far |
| Re: Shadows Of Redemption by Nobody: 9:33pm On Jun 10, 2023 |
So far I haven't read your latest posts, but based on the posts I read in the morning, it sounds like it's got some little bit of horror in it, correct me if I'm wrong...  It may be your first time writing a novel, but you can never know. You could get lucky... How about you write the book and get reviewers to review it for you?... They'll then rectify your mistakes and tell you where you need to improve.. If you don't trust anyone around you to review your book, there are a lot of platforms on the internet that specialize in ebook reviews. I've joined this other site called Online Book Club and we get paid for reading and reviewing ebooks from publishers and up coming authors like yourself. In that way, you'll be able to rectify your mistakes before publishing your book and not only could you earn from it, you may also end up as one of Africa's best authors. Personally, I don't think nairaland is the best platform for you to get reviews... Most of them are just going to look and pass, others may not be entirely honest with you, while some could steal your story and claim it as theirs. Magnetic010: |
| Re: Shadows Of Redemption by Magnetic010: 9:48pm On Jun 10, 2023 |
Samantha124:Wow thanks, I really appreciate your advice, if it’s not too much to ask can you share with me the link to the site you mentioned also no the story doesn’t contain horror I’m just trying to give John enough motivation and urgency to investigate the death of Annabella |
| Re: Shadows Of Redemption by Nobody: 8:41am On Jun 11, 2023 |
You can check the website, it's onlinebookclub.org... And good luck.. Magnetic010: 1 Like |
| Re: Shadows Of Redemption by Caleb15(m): 8:31pm On Jun 26, 2023 |
Following, and don't forget to add shoprite to your story, its around that axis |
| Re: Shadows Of Redemption by Magnetic010: 10:35pm On Jul 01, 2023 |
Caleb15:okay thanks. Didn’t think of adding Shoprite but maybe I will |
| Re: Shadows Of Redemption by Magnetic010: 10:50pm On Jul 01, 2023 |
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>CHAPTER 3<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<< After a few days of settling into his routine at the warehouse, John found himself constantly thinking about the little girl whose school ID card he had discovered. The dreams of Annabel continued to haunt him, and he couldn't shake off the feeling that returning the ID card might bring him some peace. Determined to put an end to the visions that plagued his sleep, John decided to take a step forward. He grabbed the ID card, carefully placing it in his pocket, and headed out of the warehouse after finishing his work early for the day. With the school address in hand, John made his way through the bustling streets of the city, his thoughts consumed by what awaited him at the school. The journey took him to a neighborhood filled with lively houses and the sounds of children playing. Upon reaching the school, John was greeted by a vibrant atmosphere. He could hear the sounds of children's laughter and the echoing voices of teachers guiding their students. The sight of young minds eagerly absorbing knowledge filled him with a sense of nostalgia. John approached the school's administrative building and explained his purpose to the receptionist. With a warm smile, she directed him to the office of the school's headteacher. As he entered the office, he felt a mix of anticipation and apprehension. On entering the headteacher's office, John felt a strong intuition pushing him to dig deeper into the situation surrounding Annabel. Instead of simply returning the ID card, he decided to take a more direct approach, posing as a concerned relative who had lost contact with Annabel’s parents. With a knot of nervousness in his stomach, John crafted a story about how he had recently reconnected with his long-lost uncle, Annabel's father, but for a while now he’s not been able to reach him on phone and even on social media the only information he had was from his cousin telling him about her school, luckily he had memorized it and so he was hoping she could send a message to her dad to call him. He hoped that by assuming this role, he could gain more information and possibly uncover the truth behind his persistent dreams. 1 Like |
| Re: Shadows Of Redemption by Magnetic010: 10:53pm On Jul 01, 2023 |
Continuing chapter 3 |
| Re: Shadows Of Redemption by Magnetic010: 10:54pm On Jul 01, 2023 |
Let me know what you think y’all |
| Re: Shadows Of Redemption by Magnetic010: 6:29pm On Jul 02, 2023 |
As John delved into his fabricated tale, the headteacher's expression changed subtly, a flicker of discomfort crossing her face. She seemed taken aback by the sudden mention of Annabel's parents, and John could sense a tension in the room. The headteacher hesitated for a moment before responding, carefully choosing her words. As John continued his conversation with the headteacher, hoping to gather more information about Annabel, he sensed a palpable shift in the atmosphere. The headteacher's expression grew somber, and her voice trembled as she revealed a heartbreaking truth. She informed him that his cousin died of suicide! The news struck John like a thunderbolt, and he felt a wave of sadness wash over him. Questions swirled in his mind, wondering what could have led to such a tragic outcome. Trying to maintain his composure, John probed further, asking if there was any way he could reach out to Annabel's parents or if there were any alternative contacts available. The headteacher's demeanor became even more guarded, her eyes avoiding direct contact with John's. “Do you know why your cousin commit such an ungodly act?” No ma John replied. “You see, this school is a Christian boarding school, known for its academic excellence and strong moral values. Your cousin, Annabel had been admitted to the school on a scholarship, our Daddy in the Lord provided opportunities for students from disadvantaged backgrounds to receive quality education and pursue their dreams.” “But given the opportunity to have the best of education and mingle with blessed children your cousin allowed herself become a tool for the devil” What? John was dumbfounded at the manner at which this respectable looking matured lady could speak so terribly about a dead little girl. |
| Re: Shadows Of Redemption by Magnetic010: 6:30pm On Jul 02, 2023 |
We are almost at the end of chapter 3 hope you are being entertained |
| Re: Shadows Of Redemption by Magnetic010: 6:32pm On Jul 02, 2023 |
Judging from the photo on the school ID card and the fact that he just learnt that she was in SSS1 what terribly thing could the poor child had done that was so unforgiving to warrant such ridicule from a lady who was suppose to see to their educational and mental welfare. “Yes, you wouldn’t believe what that little girl was into- she brought shame onto herself, her family and the entire school and when the truth came out about what she had done she took her own life” “Just imagine she sent herself straight to hellfire to continue her immoral acts with Lucifer and his demons” John didn’t know if he had been transported to a different time and realm when he stepped into the head teacher’s office. “How the hell did you get to become the head teacher of this school? John bloated out he couldn’t stand it anyone, “ You…you are evil” John noticed his hands trembling the anger cussing tough his veins needed to find a way out and if he didn’t control himself he might do something very very distract. “Lower your voice young man, this is not just a school but also the house of God, we do not condole such unruly behavior” Unruly? Unruly?? John was getting more than irritated, “what is unruly is you talking such crap about a dead young girl” The head mistress remained seated in her chair, given off an aura of pride and accomplishment like she had achieved what she needed to with John, seeing John so rattled and out of source she decided to go for the finishing blow. John is it? I understand how all these must be confusing and a bit overwhelming but like I pointed out earlier this is a Christian school and every child in here is expected to behave in a way and manner that glories the name of your Lord and savior Jesus Christ. She Opened the Big bible in front of her desk carefully searching for a chapter and once she’s found it she turned the book to John and motioned him to read. It was the book of Corinthians chapter 6 then she said read from verse 9 young man and see what the holy book says about your cousin and her likes. So John read it and he began the grasp why she had hailed those cuss on “his cousin” and the realization made him even angrier. So the poor girl was exploring her sexuality, is that why the school had condemned her to death and hell. Then the image of Annabel crying flashed in his head, she telling him she didn’t do it, that nobody believed her. His heart froze what if? What if she didn’t do these things she is being accused of, what if she tried to plead her case and nobody believed her? What if she got expelled from he school and she felt alone and frustrated? For a little girl of about 13-14 how could she deal with such a big accusation and having no one on her side no one who for a second believed that she was innocent? Just like my case in school. He didn’t know it but tears were gathering in his eyes as these thoughts filled his head. He couldn’t hold back anymore and the tears rolled down his eyes. Because he understood how it feels to be innocent and have no one believe you, to have all your dreams cut short because of an allegation to have the entire world turn on you and to see the disappointment of the face of your parents. He knew the feeling and if he hadn’t been as strong as he was he would have done exactly what Annabel did just to end the pain. He wiped the tears from his eyes looked the head teacher straight in her eyes “This is all your fault, you killed her” The head mistress twitched nervously on her chair, John noticed how uncomfortable she got it was as though she was trying desperately to hide her face from him but he could see it. Guilt! She felt guilty for something and it must be something regarding the poor child’s suicide. “Sir….s..ir” she stammered the confidence and pride with which she had called him young man all along was gone and she was visible trembling. Now for sure he knew something was amiss in the girl’s death. He stood up and walked out of the office, there was nothing left to discuss with the woman she was hiding something and whatever it was he was going to find out and help the poor girl clear her name…”she didn’t do it” if no one else in the world believed her, he did he knew deep within his soul she was innocent and he was going to proof her innocence. “Don’t worry Annabel I will fight for you, your death won’t be for nothing. I swear it with my last drop of blood I will fight for you” When he got to the school entrance the gateman whom he had shared a little joke with earlier studies his face and asked him if everything was fine. John reached to his back pocket brought out the ID card and showed the gateman. The young man jumped and called her name “Bella” ha na your sister? John nodded “Ooh dooh hai wetin them do that girl no…. He stopped himself before letting another word slip John took note and said his and decided to get any information he could from the gateman “My sister tell me say you dy always dy nice to them for hostel you even they help them carry things when mumsi bring come” John hope that his made up tale was somewhat true and would get the gateman to open up even just a little bit The young man smiled “Yes na, I know your sister well well na very very good girl she no dy find trouble at all she dy always dy do her own and she sabi book well well- but I no come know o this one them say she just kill herself and e come be the day when the camera no work so nobody even sure how e take happen” Oh my God CCTV John had noticed the presence of CCTV cameras when he entered the school, if she had committed suicide there must be video evidence unless it took place inside the room. He had to be sure “Bros where them for see my sister body na inside her room? Nooo for inside swimming pool, them say she jump inside swimming pool for night when water no dy ooo. Just imagine oo wetin go make Bella do that kind thing na…Bella!! ha John thought maybe this was why the head teacher was so nervous. The CCTV choose to not work on the day of Bella’s death and judging from the gateman’s accretion they circumstances surrounding her “suicide wasn’t clear” He exchanged contacts with the gateman offered him money for being so good to his sister whilst she was alive but he gracefully refused and asked him to extend his condolences to their parents. A sinking feeling settled in John's chest as he realized that there was more to this situation than met the eye. Something was amiss, and the headteacher's reaction only intensified his suspicions. Though disappointed by the lack of information, John knew he couldn't push any further without jeopardizing his cover. Meanwhile back in the office, headteacher felt a sense of unease settling within her. She knew she had to take action immediately. Reaching for her phone, she dialed a number she knew by heart. It rang several times before someone finally answered on the other end. "Hello?" a concerned voice responded. "Hello, it's me," the headteacher said, her voice filled with urgency. "Someone just came to the school asking about Bella. He seemed determined to find out more." There was a pause on the other end of the line, and the headteacher could sense the tension. The person on the phone knew exactly who she was talking about. "Do you think there might be trouble?" the voice on the phone asked, filled with concern. The headteacher sighed, her voice trembling slightly. "I can't be sure, but something doesn't feel right. I had to be cautious and give away as little information as possible. We need to stay vigilant and protect the truth." The person on the other end of the line understood the gravity of the situation. The thought of the past being unearthed stirred a mix of fear and determination within them. "We can't let the secrets be exposed," the voice said firmly. "We'll have to be proactive and take the necessary measures to ensure the truth remains hidden." The headteacher nodded, even though the other person couldn't see her. "Agreed. We have to protect the school, the students, We can't let anyone jeopardize what we've built here." They knew that the truth could have far-reaching consequences, not only for themselves but for everyone involved. As they hung up the phone, the head teacher felt a weight on her shoulders. The responsibility to protect the truth weighed heavily upon her, but she was determined to uphold the integrity of the school no matter the cost. |
| Re: Shadows Of Redemption by Magnetic010: 6:33pm On Jul 02, 2023 |
Well folks that the end of chapter 3 chapter 4 to follow shortly 1 Like |
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