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Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. - Family - Nairaland

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Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by uwuana: 6:36am On Sep 15, 2023
Good day fellow nairaland, please I have some Pressing issues on my neck that am trying to laid off, but the more I tried the more a new chapter will open.
5 years ago when I married My wife, my life was in total mess, things was so difficult for me as of then, I was working under contract in a company and the salary was just a peanut, I was staying in a face me apartment, that was when I get to know this family, when my wife give birth to our first child everywhere was rough and tough for me I couldn't even afford the hospital bill because I haven't received salary for two months with the company new policy, well it was this woman my neighbor wife that borrowed me the money to pay, I was so happy and pray for her that for this good she did for me God will answer her secret prayers.well things wasn't going well and my wife suggest I should quit my job that we should relocate to her place in the Niger Delta, I told to have patience that I have a feeling that the job am doing will pave way and things will work out fine, things started to get better and I was able to get a self con apartment and we moved in and left my neighbor in the face me compound, after two years my wife said she going to her place to start up a business, I tried to persuade her to stay but she refused,by December last year I gathered all I have and gave her to go. Well things changed and by January this year a new announcement was made in the company am working, it's no more contract, the contractor was sacked and am the new person in charge of my session and there was huge increase in salary, I was so happy and rejoicing, me that was collecting 35k and now 120k, I called my wife and asked her to come back but she refused, she said business is booming she can't leave it and come back, that she can only visit when the kids have holidays, well by March this year I was able to get new and comfortable place, I moved in.
On Easter day I had a visitors, it was my former neighbor wife and one of her sister, she said she has been to my former place but she was informed I parked out and my former landlord directed her here, I was so happy to see her,we exchange greetings and I offered them what I cooked, she asked about my wife if she has made up her mind to come back, I said no, after all the jolly and merriment they left, I went their place the next Sunday to greet them, everything is not alright, I can see the anger in her face, I met them on a family meeting, I had to leave, she later came to my place in the evening and explain everything that's is going on to me, she said she has been living in sorry and pain see I knew her in that compound, she asked me if wife didn't tell me anything about it I said no, she said she was the bread winner of the family, she the one paying the all the bills including rent and the children school fee's, the husband is a okada rider,he collect the bike on higher purchased, and he doesn't bring anything back to the family, this has been going on like that for all those years and she can't continue again because the Man want to kill her before her time with four children, that was why she called for the family meeting, she was telling me all this things things with tears rolling from her eyes, I told her to stop crying that everything will be alright, after she left I called my wife and asked her if what her friend said is true, she said yes,I was shocked and I started thinking what to do to assist her, I called her and she came to my place, I gave her 20k, she was so happy and thanked me very much, but I didn't inform my wife about the money I gave her friend, later on I started feeling lonely since my wife is around the thought of this woman is always on my head, I tried to fight it but e no work, she came visit one day and she told me she not a kid that I should tell her what's in my mind, I was confused, I thought about the respect and other things I said no to myself,I couldn't say out, she told me she has the same feelings for me, that am the source of her happiness,we both kiss each other, since then our relationship has become something so strong that I can't even break, the more I tried to break it the more it becomes stronger, she has been coming to me steadily and giving me sex, she said her body is mine, and I have been assisting, I helped to pay the rent and children school fee's last term, I talked to her yesterday that what we are doing is not good, how does she feel sleeping with her best friend husband, she said she thought about it also but she can't control it that she doesn't have any feelings for her husband again, that if I leave her she will die, because I have been the one carrying all this burden for her, please advise me what to do to stop This so that she won't get hurt,

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Re: Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by MrsTwrite(f): 6:50am On Sep 15, 2023
grin grin grin
Odogwu grin well-done 🙌
To cut the whole story short, you committed Adultery. Open up to your wife, tell her everything. The earlier the better.

4 Likes

Re: Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by uwuana: 7:04am On Sep 15, 2023
Yesterday I asked her so many things and she open up another chapter of what she passing through, she said early January this year her husband was locked up in the police station, she was called up, she went there and they said her husband collect loan of 100k from somebody and refused to pay, so they had to settle for him to be paying instalmental, but before they released him he must pay 40k upfront, January that things are rough, she had to go borrowed from her place of work to secure his released, since then he didn't even talk about how to repay the 40k back,he doesn't bring any money for food at home, how he spent the money he borrowed she doesn't know, but at the end of the day she was the one suffering for it, that it was all the assistance that I was giving her that she was able to settle the debt, she said this is another reason she can't get me off her life, that am different, that am so special, I bought her pads in June, she said her husband saw it and asked her what the thing is, she told him is bread that he should go and eat it, that I can see how bad things are, even pads her husband did not know because he has never bought it for her since she married him

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Re: Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by illicit(m): 7:05am On Sep 15, 2023
Na married woman with 4 kids u dey take cure konji

Weldone sir

8 Likes

Re: Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by uwuana: 7:06am On Sep 15, 2023
MrsTwrite:
grin grin grin
Odogwu grin well-done 🙌
To cut the whole story short, you committed Adultery. Open up to your wife, tell her everything. The earlier the better.
I know, but I want to stop it, she is giving me reason not to stop, that if I leave her she will die, I don't want her to commit suicide all because of me
Re: Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by uwuana: 7:17am On Sep 15, 2023
illicit:
Na married woman with 4 kids u dey take cure konji

Weldone sir
😁😁😁, you gat me laughing, but this is not funny

2 Likes

Re: Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by burp18: 7:17am On Sep 15, 2023
this is why couples shouldn't be apart for too long. The funny thing is your wife might also be having an affair with someone else out there just like you're doing now.

14 Likes

Re: Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by uwuana: 7:22am On Sep 15, 2023
burp18:
this is why couples shouldn't be apart for too long. The funny thing is your wife might also be having an affair with someone else out there just like you're doing now.
I had same thought about this, she told me it's 50-50, because I don't know the life my wife is living over there.

1 Like

Re: Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by doggedfighter(f): 7:25am On Sep 15, 2023
uwuana:
I know, but I want to stop it, she is giving me reason not to stop, that if I leave her she will die, I don't want her to commit suicide all because of me

I don't want her to die too


So continue, please

2 Likes

Re: Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by doggedfighter(f): 7:26am On Sep 15, 2023
uwuana:
I had same thought about this, she told me it's 50-50, because I don't know the life my wife is living over there.

What's 50-50 ?
Re: Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by uwuana: 7:37am On Sep 15, 2023
doggedfighter:


What's 50-50 ?
life
Re: Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by TimT: 7:38am On Sep 15, 2023
Lol... wahala .. The heights people climb just to commit adultery can never be overestimated...

See what money caused?
When you were broke, she assisted you, Una no fu..ck...
Now she is broke, you assisted her, and still do..
Sorry OP, but let me tell you, you can never progress in this life... no be curse o, na fact ..
As it is, you are now shouldering responsibility that isn't yours, and also heavier than you...
Even if your salary is 1m , life no go still better for you ..
When u were broke, where to see money dey Ur agenda, now money don come, na where to fu..ck...
Either your wife comes back, or you go and meet her...
That your neighbour is hustling for her 4kids oo..
And herself..
Plus her husband coz any money u give her, she takes home and cook rice and stew, the husband go follow chop.. chai, ontop your head ...
See as you dey use your hand dey scatter your own life ....

20 Likes

Re: Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by Nobody: 7:39am On Sep 15, 2023
You nailed my thoughts!
burp18:
this is why couples shouldn't be apart for too long. The funny thing is your wife might also be having an affair with someone else out there just like you're doing now.

1 Like

Re: Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by Nobody: 7:44am On Sep 15, 2023
Heeeeeee na WA oooo
Another family wahala
Sometimes I wonder what some people think marriage is.
Comfortably sleeping with another man's wife all in the name of I helped her and she threw her body at me, both of you are sick.
Now he wants to console himself by saying he doesn't know what his wife is doing over there too.
All of you in this mess are sick, soooooo sick.

3 Likes

Re: Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by opera1(m): 7:51am On Sep 15, 2023
Do not take the advantage of another man's family. It's God that elevated you to this level so use it wisely. You can bless the family without anything in return.
You ve been eyeing the woman even while you wife was around.
Please Don't destroy another man's family.

The woman is out to destroy you and your family. Please put an end to it.

1 Like

Re: Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by Foodqueen(f): 8:05am On Sep 15, 2023
Stop it now and make sure you communicate everything to your wife.

That woman won't commit suicide cos of you. It's just a blackmail.

What was your wife thinking when she left her marriage to go back home.

1 Like

Re: Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by talented321: 8:09am On Sep 15, 2023
With my loud and weed..

Tdollar and zino keep the vibe going...

Your wife choose business over her marriage.
This woman help you for free, why is it so hard for you to help her out'' just as my brother TimT said..
Both you, your wife and the said woman and her husband is at fault.
But on a second thought what is there in a woman who has four or is she that beautiful?.
That woman love sex that's why she end up with that irresponsible man. I don't like cheating because i have the right to marry another woman if you decide to choose business over me but at the same time a man will cheat depend on how his wife is treating him but not with another man's wife..
There are 60% chances ur wife is doing something over there if not how can u leave ur marriage just like that.
Tell ur wife u are not comfortable with her way of life and if she refuse you know what to do as a man..
Remember sex is spirit especially the ones with emotions and deep feeling.. I feel for that woman sha, frustration bad.

2 Likes

Re: Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by uwuana: 8:20am On Sep 15, 2023
Foodqueen:
Stop it now and make sure you communicate everything to your wife.

That woman won't commit suicide cos of you. It's just a blackmail.

What was your wife thinking when she left her marriage to go back home.
thank you for your advice, I think this is what I will do, the reason why she left was my salary was too small to sustain the family, but there was a huge increase this year and I asked her to come back but she refused, she said her business is moving fine.

1 Like

Re: Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by jackmrandy: 9:29am On Sep 15, 2023
oga this your case is strong. first what are you enjoying in a woman who has four kids already? when you gave her that first assistance, you shouldn't have had anything emotional to do it with again since the hllep came from your heart. Now you went ahead and have her. what do you think will happen after that. she will come back for more and thats what is happening now. its better you cut the nacking with her off totally and if you need to render any assistance to her, do it out of free will and not because you want sex in return. when she helped you the first time, did she asked of sex from you? hell no. so if you want to be safe, cut the sex off, the friendship can still remain. and let this be your own secret and never to be told to anyone because if you tell your wife, like people are saying tell your wife, thats the end of your marriage. yes. thats the end. you wife better not find out about this. keep it to yourself. even the woman husband, if he finds out you have been sleeping with his wife, he go find you, trust those okada riders, sleep with their wife, he go jam your leg. as for the woman, if her husband can't take care of her anymore, she should call off the marriage. how can she be paying rent, school fees, and feeding and the man say he dey hustle yet he nor dey bring anything come house. abi na cause dey follow am

3 Likes

Re: Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by uwuana: 9:58am On Sep 15, 2023
jackmrandy:
oga this your case is strong. first what are you enjoying in a woman who has four kids already? when you gave her that first assistance, you shouldn't have had anything emotional to do it with again since the hllep came from your heart. Now you went ahead and have her. what do you think will happen after that. she will come back for more and thats what is happening now. its better you cut the nacking with her off totally and if you need to render any assistance to her, do it out of free will and not because you want sex in return. when she helped you the first time, did she asked of sex from you? hell no. so if you want to be safe, cut the sex off, the friendship can still remain. and let this be your own secret and never to be told to anyone because if you tell your wife, like people are saying tell your wife, thats the end of your marriage. yes. thats the end. you wife better not find out about this. keep it to yourself. even the woman husband, if he finds out you have been sleeping with his wife, he go find you, trust those okada riders, sleep with their wife, he go jam your leg. as for the woman, if her husband can't take care of her anymore, she should call off the marriage. how can she be paying rent, school fees, and feeding and the man say he dey hustle yet he nor dey bring anything come house. abi na cause dey follow am
Thank you my bro for this piece of advice, what happened that day between two of us honestly I can't explain it , because she told me she has feelings for me long time ago that she don't know how to tell me, she also said she has been praying to God to give her somebody to uplift her from her burdens, that God answered her prayer through me.

1 Like

Re: Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by jackmrandy: 10:19am On Sep 15, 2023
uwuana:
Thank you my bro for this piece of advice, what happened that day between two of us honestly I can't explain it , because she told me she has feelings for me long time ago that she don't know how to tell me, she also said she has been praying to God to give her somebody to uplift her from her burdens, that God answered her prayer through me.



oya na, marrry her and have her as a second wife. excuses
Re: Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by Nobody: 11:57am On Sep 15, 2023
@UWUANA, are you the man who is sleeping with the OP's wife from this other thread (see link below) that was posted yesterday by someone else? Are both of you men on Nairaland?

https://www.nairaland.com/7840965/needed-what#125798696
Re: Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by Brandiebird: 2:45pm On Sep 15, 2023
Poverty and fucking is like 5&6 🤮🤮🤮

3 Likes

Re: Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by Kobojunkie: 2:46pm On Sep 15, 2023
uwuana:
Yesterday I asked her so many things and she open up another chapter of what she passing through, she said early January this year her husband was locked up in the police station, she was called up, she went there and they said her husband collect loan of 100k from somebody and refused to pay, so they had to settle for him to be paying instalmental, [size=8pt]but before they released him he must pay 40k upfront, January that things are rough, she had to go borrowed from her place of work to secure his released, since then he didn't even talk about how to repay the 40k back,he doesn't bring any money for food at home, how he spent the money he borrowed she doesn't know, but at the end of the day she was the one suffering for it, that it was all the assistance that I was giving her that she was able to settle the debt, she said this is another reason she can't get me off her life, that am different, that am so special, I bought her pads in June, she said her husband saw it and asked her what the thing is, she told him is bread that he should go and eat it, that I can see how bad things are, even pads her husband did not know because he has never bought it for her since she married him
OP, this woman stayed and had 4 kids with a man who she claims was not bringing money into the house? She was the breadwinner and still continued to have kids for the man regardless. Now she has no problem committing adultery with you and then collecting money from you so she can continue to support her husband and the 4 kids she had with him? undecided

Why are you this stewpid? undecided

https://www.nairaland.com/7841817/prophet-oluwaseun-akinnubi-impregnates-friends#125808897

1 Like

Re: Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by Ibechris2: 3:31pm On Sep 15, 2023
MrsTwrite:
grin grin grin
Odogwu grin well-done 🙌
To cut the whole story short, you committed Adultery. Open up to your wife, tell her everything. The earlier the better.


How do u know he is an odogwu?
Re: Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by Ibechris2: 3:35pm On Sep 15, 2023
IconicR:
Heeeeeee na WA oooo
Another family wahala
Sometimes I wonder what some people think marriage is.
Comfortably sleeping with another man's wife all in the name of I helped her and she threw her body at me, both of you are sick.
Now he wants to console himself by saying he doesn't know what his wife is doing over there too.
All of you in this mess are sick, soooooo sick.



I know u will be here...madam know it all alias iyabe

1 Like

Re: Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by stacyadams: 3:37pm On Sep 15, 2023
uwuana:
I know, but I want to stop it, she is giving me reason not to stop, that if I leave her she will die, I don't want her to commit suicide all because of me

No tell ur wife oooooo
Re: Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by Nobody: 3:46pm On Sep 15, 2023
Ibechris2:




I know u will be here...madam know it all alias iyabe
I'm everywhere 😂
Re: Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by uwuana: 5:18pm On Sep 15, 2023
Kobojunkie:
OP, this woman stayed and had 4 kids with a man who she claims was not bringing money into the house? She was the breadwinner and still continued to have kids for the man regardless. Now she has no problem committing adultery with you and then collecting money from you so she can continue to support her husband and the 4 kids she had with him? undecided

Why are you this stewpid? undecided

https://www.nairaland.com/7841817/prophet-oluwaseun-akinnubi-impregnates-friends#125808897
there so many things I didn't give details because the epistle will be longer, firstly the woman in person she working in a company that produces engine oil and she told me her salary is around 30k, she not depending on me because of the assistance am rendering to her, she has made it known to me that even if am not giving her anything she won't stop loving me because I have already brought Joy into her life, the husband in question? She told me she has stopped giving him food since last year December and he doesn't bother to ask since he knows he is not dropping feeding money, also she told me that her elder sister and brother in the village has asked her to bring back the children and Start a new life over there, but she said no, because it won't be easy for her as there is nothing for her to do in the village, but she can manage with her current salary and look after the children, she is not a lazy person, she hard working woman and I respect her for that.

1 Like

Re: Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by Kobojunkie: 5:31pm On Sep 15, 2023
uwuana:
there so many things I didn't give details because the epistle will be longer, firstly the woman in person she working in a company that produces engine oil and she told me her salary is around 30k, she not depending on me because of the assistance am rendering to her, she has made it known to me that even if am not giving her anything she won't stop loving me because I have already brought Joy into her life, the husband in question? She told me she has stopped giving him food since last year December and he doesn't bother to ask since he knows he is not dropping feeding money, also she told me that her elder sister and brother in the village has asked her to bring back the children and Start a new life over there, but she said no, because it won't be easy for her as there is nothing for her to do in the village, but she can manage with her current salary and look after the children, she is not a lazy person, she hard working woman and I respect her for that.
You are yourself a married man with a child of your own to take care of, and here asking strangers for advice. But here you are busy trying to regale us with stories of the other woman and her marital issues as if we are all supposed to somehow applaud you for trying to save the woman you cheated on your wife with using your dick. undecided

I really don't understand your particular problem since you seem to want to continue the affair with this woman. A married man having an affair with a married woman, na wa o undecided
Re: Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by Intergrated: 5:37pm On Sep 15, 2023
Wait na salary of 120 you take dey do all this things. Guy abeg talk Truth abeg.

4 Likes

Re: Advice Needed On This Pressing Issue. by GboyegaD(m): 6:09pm On Sep 15, 2023
Why not ask your wife to move back or you move to where she is? If the distance is not so bad, make arrangement to see her often as a way to overcome the sexual urge that is making you give in to the woman.

She is only using you as a source to solve her financial challenges and the end of your pleasure might be so painful. Let her know you are no longer interested in the sex situationship you guys are having.

2 Likes

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