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Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / Jokes Etc / I Owe My Mom. (1620 Views)
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I Owe My Mom. by Txlonghorn(m): 5:11am On Apr 06, 2006 |
1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE. "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning." 2. My mother taught me RELIGION. "You better pray that will come out of the carpet." 3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL. "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!" 4. My mother taught me LOGIC. " Because I said so, that's why." 5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC. "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me." 6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT. "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident." 7. My mother taught me IRONY. "Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about." 8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS. "Shut your mouth and eat your supper." 9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM. "Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!" 10. My mother taught me about STAMINA. "You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone." 11. My mother taught me about WEATHER. "This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it." 12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY. "If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!" 13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE. "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out." 14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION. "Stop acting like your father!" 15. My mother taught me about ENVY. "There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do." 16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION. "Just wait until we get home." 17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING. "You are going to get it when you get home!" 18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE. "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way." 19. My mother taught me ESP. "Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?" 20. My mother taught me HUMOR. "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me." 21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT. "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up." 22. My mother taught me GENETICS. "You're just like your father." 23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS. "Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?" 24. My mother taught me WISDOM. "When you get to be my age, you'll understand." 25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE. "One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you" |
Re: I Owe My Mom. by Rolly: 7:26pm On Apr 07, 2006 |
this is wonderful!!!! i couldnt stop laughing!!! |
Re: I Owe My Mom. by diddy4(m): 7:29pm On Apr 07, 2006 |
nice one dude |
Re: I Owe My Mom. by Efani(m): 9:01pm On Apr 07, 2006 |
yo u suck txlonghorn make it shorter |
Re: I Owe My Mom. by Rhodalyn(f): 1:35am On Apr 08, 2006 |
lovely |
Re: I Owe My Mom. by Oracle(m): 5:29am On Apr 08, 2006 |
beautiful |
Re: I Owe My Mom. by jayemkay(f): 2:42pm On Apr 08, 2006 |
how funny! |
Re: I Owe My Mom. by Rhodalyn(f): 6:08pm On Apr 09, 2006 |
Efani:looks like ur da only one who thks so |
Re: I Owe My Mom. by Junior88: 6:11pm On Apr 09, 2006 |
good one |
Re: I Owe My Mom. by dabby(f): 8:51pm On Jul 28, 2007 |
That was really really good. |
Re: I Owe My Mom. by osereka(m): 9:12pm On Jul 28, 2007 |
is good, gooder goodest |
Re: I Owe My Mom. by ayanjide(m): 2:11pm On Aug 02, 2007 |
txlonghorn, u kept my eyeballs wet by rekindling my love 4 my sweet mother |
Re: I Owe My Mom. by ladebi(m): 2:17pm On Aug 02, 2007 |
Mama is sure the best thing. |
Re: I Owe My Mom. by skirmish: 2:51pm On Aug 02, 2007 |
My best in Nairaland! |
Re: I Owe My Mom. by clemcykul(f): 9:41am On Aug 03, 2007 |
facts of life! dint ur papa tell u anything? i bet u have 4goten kul joke, keep em comn. |
Re: I Owe My Mom. by sweetberry(f): 10:57am On Nov 23, 2007 |
Re: I Owe My Mom. by ituen(m): 8:01pm On Nov 23, 2007 |
A tribute to all mums |
Re: I Owe My Mom. by dondee2(m): 2:42pm On Mar 27, 2008 |
it confimed ok.nice one |
Re: I Owe My Mom. by rominiyi(f): 12:30pm On Mar 18, 2009 |
My best so far , couldnt help laughing . Oh! this keeps me so rocking |
Re: I Owe My Mom. by romsky: 12:35pm On Mar 18, 2009 |
hey my twinny is around ow r u romi |
Re: I Owe My Mom. by CrazyMan(m): 12:47pm On Mar 18, 2009 |
Romade you can marry her so that I would come and eat. I hardly eat anything reasonable these days. |
Re: I Owe My Mom. by Lolabbey: 12:48pm On Mar 18, 2009 |
kai,u go don remain skeleton oo |
Re: I Owe My Mom. by romsky: 12:53pm On Mar 18, 2009 |
i pity d crazy pikin o |
(1) (Reply)
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