debayun:
In my own little opinion you should quit your job and join your wife in her business so it becomes a family business then any income earned will be an effort from both sides cos 60k in this time is nothing cos 60k is just earning $150 and to be comfortable a little u should earn at least $400 that's if u stay in a relatively cheap area.

though this actually looks senseless but sensible, if actually one is very hardworking, money wise and have the technical know how, some savings from salary over two years or so invested in the business could transform the business in few years into a house hold or chain of businesses

but I am not sure if any wife could understand
since it's not a day one thing
I am not also sure if one won't start feeling to comfortable plus such business could be a business of season, but it is a ugly but beautiful idea

xendra:
now you are trying to be an ingrate, you are not even shameful enough that a woman is catering for you, you now want to prove a man to your family with her money. SMH! tell them you don't have money and stop adding to the woman's stress.

On top #200?

Preshy561:

Too harsh

I thought I was the only one that noticed it. Maybe she's frustrated herself, by herself and with herself.

tee59:
Your wife is the head of your family in as much as she takes the major financial responsibility of that house. It can be frustrating at times, saddling the burden of the both families. She's a strong woman and must be appreciated. You need to make more money to take back your leadership role in your home. I know, there are some decisions both of you need to make but if your wife disagrees, it won't work out.Your wife can not be totally submissive to you, let be frank here. You're too lazy to make more money.

Please volunteer yourself let him use you for rutual . Too lazy? He's working and earning 60k while some are earning 20k ,yet you call it lazy?

What of those that are jobless? Wonder what you will tell them.

Deepfeel:
Money is the problem make money and all your problems are solved

No too long talk.Straight on point.

Hotworta1:
My dear your wife is stressed. Try and double your hustle you too. If your wife has really achieved this much and has been very supportive from your narration indeed she's a wife material.

Pls try and get an additional income biko...the situation of the country presently isn't something for someone to just be lazy or dependent on one source of income.


Pls reason with her biko

xendra:
now you are trying to be an ingrate, you are not even shameful enough that a woman is catering for you, you now want to prove a man to your family with her money. SMH! tell them you don't have money and stop adding to the woman's stress.

kids everywhere, actually the post is not for people like you look at shameless you are simple sentences you can't understand why on earth you did not see where he said the business of the woman is down?

emerald16:


What do I do? Even when I try to initiate a conversation, she doesn't seem interested

it's ok to have issues in marriage but as time goes on you should try to understand hard to the extent that you know what causes rift between both of you and avoid them.

am sure your marriage is less than five years

xendra:
now you are trying to be an ingrate, you are not even shameful enough that a woman is catering for you, you now want to prove a man to your family with her money. SMH! tell them you don't have money and stop adding to the woman's stress.

Shut up

Preshy561:

Too harsh

what is too harsh? Am a man and i know she just said the truth.

emerald16:
My wife has been really helpful from when we started dating, she has actually taken me from grass to grace and helped me from a self contained to a 3bedroom flat. She has been helping with house expenses for over a year now, I do work but my salary is very small, just around 60k.

She is into business which flourished so much but it's a little down for now. She helped made our marriage possible by contributing far more than i. She is every woman's dream and is even poised to help me secure a better job and a side business.

I have also contributed my part in helping her grow her business though not financially but through technical support, expert advice and more as she just started her business the very month we started dating but though in a small way with very little capital.

I feel I have over burdened her with my own problem and she is carrying way too much on her shoulders cos her parents and siblings are also depending on her.
I felt a pinch of her frustration when I asked her if she could help transfer a little sum of 200 naira to me for airtime, she was about doing it when I told her I actually wanted to send the amount as airtime to my dad,then she flared up saying she will take care of me, herself and even my parents! I felt bad and terrible cos I rarely ask her for money to send to my people except on very rare occasions which are but a few.

I kept mute and didn't feel like talking to her and we haven't exchanged a proper conversation since last night when it happened.

What do I do? Even when I try to initiate a conversation, she doesn't seem interested

my prayer is that God will have mercy on you... what you are lacking to be a complete man he will give you the provisions... go beg her... she is your wife and don't keep malice with her.

Preshy561:
Too harsh

you're a reasonable woman, more blessing.

jeff1607:



it is possible, if one can't manage a small amount , when a larger sum comes he or she will say the same story.

some guys earn 200k monthly but can't boast of any savings and yet they complain it's too small

In managing salary, the environment you live in matters. I for one can live well on that salary if my wife earns same amount. But in some places, thats suicide

LordKO:
Embrace and pet your wife, her unsavoury outburst notwithstanding. She simply acted on impulse of stress/frustration. After making peace with her, you can then calmly register your displeasure towards her tactless reaction and implore her to refrain from doing such next time. . . she could have easily turned down your request instead of rattling you with tactless reaction.

Citing your submission, on a general note, both of you're responsible, despite your financial limitations at the moment. Keep on putting in your best.

you're blessed

EmekaBlue:
@least women should have a taste of what men go thru...u take care of her,her siblings and parents....im not even talking 200naira here

what men go through...

Rosarie:
honestly u lack mannerrs of talking.am I your daughter that you are questions like that?.for your information I am married with kids.if you want to make a point do so decently.u are asking me a question like who??.if I can ever bla bla.do u know my journey??the fact this is a social media does not mean you will not speak rightly.it is not madatory you quote me

Na question I ask ma. No vex

ImaIma1:
When someone says marrying on that kind of salary is not advisable, they will say we are materialistic.

Imagine if a child is involved. You will know that it's not about being prudent or being a wife material.

Meanwhile, on this forum, a guy has been urged on to get married on a 40k salary. You guys should tell yourself the truth and stop hiding under "a good woman will manage"

This is real life, real expenses.

when you're fifty years and earn bogus salaries, you'll marry then.

Amuocha:
But where is lalasticlala sef

in your pocket.

Acidosis:


Oga say what you know. There are many married men earning that salary, and even less. The average salary of a teacher in a private school is lower, yet some married men work in these schools. Not only teachers, all the lab scientists with ND in your universities, and other National Diploma holders in banks, military, police, civil service, custom, prisons, etc. earn around or same figure.

You lots should stop putting pressure on people. Rather preach contentment, financial/wealth management and, of course, empowerment.

This young man failed in the area of financial management. I'm not sure he has kids, yet he allowed his taste and that of his wife pushed him to a 3-bedroom apartment. You can imagine how they spend wrecklessly on other household needs because wifey's biz dey boom - a case of eating their dinner in the morning.

Best comment, god bless you. The op and his wife assumed the position of big man too early and family members of both of them thought they are rich, that is why they bring all their burdens to them. A reasonable man would have be in a self contain room and parlour and invest than living a life that is draining him financially

60k
Not bad
40k to flex everymonth

ImaIma1:
When someone says marrying on that kind of salary is not advisable, they will say we are materialistic.

Imagine if a child is involved. You will know that it's not about being prudent or being a wife material.

Meanwhile, on this forum, a guy has been urged on to get married on a 40k salary. You guys should tell yourself the truth and stop hiding under "a good woman will manage"

This is real life, real expenses.

I got married when i was earning that amount..... But now my salary is in '5'zeros..

Who says you can't.... Its your determination to make a success and your wife effort and understanding that makes the difference

emerald16:
My wife has been really helpful from when we started dating, she has actually taken me from grass to grace and helped me from a self contained to a 3bedroom flat. She has been helping with house expenses for over a year now, I do work but my salary is very small, just around 60k.

She is into business which flourished so much but it's a little down for now. She helped made our marriage possible by contributing far more than i. She is every woman's dream and is even poised to help me secure a better job and a side business.

I have also contributed my part in helping her grow her business though not financially but through technical support, expert advice and more as she just started her business the very month we started dating but though in a small way with very little capital.

I feel I have over burdened her with my own problem and she is carrying way too much on her shoulders cos her parents and siblings are also depending on her.
I felt a pinch of her frustration when I asked her if she could help transfer a little sum of 200 naira to me for airtime, she was about doing it when I told her I actually wanted to send the amount as airtime to my dad,then she flared up saying she will take care of me, herself and even my parents! I felt bad and terrible cos I rarely ask her for money to send to my people except on very rare occasions which are but a few.

I kept mute and didn't feel like talking to her and we haven't exchanged a proper conversation since last night when it happened.

What do I do? Even when I try to initiate a conversation, she doesn't seem interested

boss sorry to say u no get sense.. Why bring this small nd personal issue to nairaland you see what social media has caused!

emerald16:
My wife has been really helpful from when we started dating, she has actually taken me from grass to grace and helped me from a self contained to a 3bedroom flat. She has been helping with house expenses for over a year now, I do work but my salary is very small, just around 60k.

She is into business which flourished so much but it's a little down for now. She helped made our marriage possible by contributing far more than i. She is every woman's dream and is even poised to help me secure a better job and a side business.

I have also contributed my part in helping her grow her business though not financially but through technical support, expert advice and more as she just started her business the very month we started dating but though in a small way with very little capital.

I feel I have over burdened her with my own problem and she is carrying way too much on her shoulders cos her parents and siblings are also depending on her.
I felt a pinch of her frustration when I asked her if she could help transfer a little sum of 200 naira to me for airtime, she was about doing it when I told her I actually wanted to send the amount as airtime to my dad,then she flared up saying she will take care of me, herself and even my parents! I felt bad and terrible cos I rarely ask her for money to send to my people except on very rare occasions which are but a few.

I kept mute and didn't feel like talking to her and we haven't exchanged a proper conversation since last night when it happened.

What do I do? Even when I try to initiate a conversation, she doesn't seem interested

I appreciate you recognise her contributions to the growth of your family

Women are nit naturally made to carry family burden, but when circumstances made them so, it becomes difficult for them to do so unless by the grace of God

I will suggest you let your parents and siblings know that you are financially handicapped to run your home and assisting them

Let them know the real truth that your wife have been the pillar from day one

Then don't ever bring your father's family financial issues to her, she doesn't need it

She is already over burdened and would not like you to link her with such

Any one from your father's family that you can't handle, push it aside

Respect yourself over her

It takes a man a great deal to respect himself because women gets triggered easily when a man doesn't know when not to cross a line

atakamus:
You're lucky my guy. She is only keeping malice. She tried na . Must you tell her you want to send something to your dad?
You're lucky Sha. If it is the one lying beside me here, you go wash plate before you will eat. Malice keeper.
Common go and hug her, kiss her and make passionate love to her. Idiot.

Correct guy

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emerald16:
Thanks guys please I don't want this on front page

It's already on front page �. You should not have kept malice with her. From your � write up you need to apologize to her and work harder for more income to assist the family �.

tee59:
Your wife is the head of your family in as much as she takes the major financial responsibility of that house. It can be frustrating at times, saddling the burden of the both families. She's a strong woman and must be appreciated. You need to make more money to take back your leadership role in your home. I know, there are some decisions both of you need to make but if your wife disagrees, it won't work out.Your wife can not be totally submissive to you, let be frank here. You're too lazy to make more money.

You are right, but the woman is not the head of the house or family. It's a God given position to the husband. Understand this. The man must work harder

emerald16:
My wife has been really helpful from when we started dating, she has actually taken me from grass to grace and helped me from a self contained to a 3bedroom flat. She has been helping with house expenses for over a year now, I do work but my salary is very small, just around 60k.

She is into business which flourished so much but it's a little down for now. She helped made our marriage possible by contributing far more than i. She is every woman's dream and is even poised to help me secure a better job and a side business.

I have also contributed my part in helping her grow her business though not financially but through technical support, expert advice and more as she just started her business the very month we started dating but though in a small way with very little capital.

I feel I have over burdened her with my own problem and she is carrying way too much on her shoulders cos her parents and siblings are also depending on her.
I felt a pinch of her frustration when I asked her if she could help transfer a little sum of 200 naira to me for airtime, she was about doing it when I told her I actually wanted to send the amount as airtime to my dad,then she flared up saying she will take care of me, herself and even my parents! I felt bad and terrible cos I rarely ask her for money to send to my people except on very rare occasions which are but a few.

I kept mute and didn't feel like talking to her and we haven't exchanged a proper conversation since last night when it happened.

What do I do? Even when I try to initiate a conversation, she doesn't seem interested

you're slowly losing respect bro.... Go make more money

emerald16:
My wife has been really helpful from when we started dating, she has actually taken me from grass to grace and helped me from a self contained to a 3bedroom flat. She has been helping with house expenses for over a year now, I do work but my salary is very small, just around 60k.

She is into business which flourished so much but it's a little down for now. She helped made our marriage possible by contributing far more than i. She is every woman's dream and is even poised to help me secure a better job and a side business.

I have also contributed my part in helping her grow her business though not financially but through technical support, expert advice and more as she just started her business the very month we started dating but though in a small way with very little capital.

I feel I have over burdened her with my own problem and she is carrying way too much on her shoulders cos her parents and siblings are also depending on her.
I felt a pinch of her frustration when I asked her if she could help transfer a little sum of 200 naira to me for airtime, she was about doing it when I told her I actually wanted to send the amount as airtime to my dad,then she flared up saying she will take care of me, herself and even my parents! I felt bad and terrible cos I rarely ask her for money to send to my people except on very rare occasions which are but a few.

I kept mute and didn't feel like talking to her and we haven't exchanged a proper conversation since last night when it happened.

What do I do? Even when I try to initiate a conversation, she doesn't seem interested

iz like something is doing you or you are doing something. Ur papa sef dey forkyala up to dey ask u for recharge card at that age.

smasher1:


You are right, but the woman is not the head of the house or family. It's a God given position to the husband. Understand this. The man must work harder

in your case she is the head, nothing like gender inequality in heaven. . .better be hardworking! Wish I married such wife rather than a 4k-N-sleep woman.

ImaIma1:
When someone says marrying on that kind of salary is not advisable, they will say we are materialistic.

Imagine if a child is involved. You will know that it's not about being prudent or being a wife material.

Meanwhile, on this forum, a guy has been urged on to get married on a 40k salary. You guys should tell yourself the truth and stop hiding under "a good woman will manage"

This is real life, real expenses.

The salary is not the problem. At 60k a month, the man has no right to beg his wife for recharge card of any denomination to use for anybody. He crossed the line there. Although the woman reacted wrongly based on frustration, the man needs to work on money management skills firstly before making more money. Because he may earn more than 100k a month and ask for 1,000 recharge card tomorrow. He does not know how to manage money.
It's not everytime one needs money that you act on impulse. You can wait for the next pay day to buy that recharge card or buy on credit and not from his spouse money